A "Glow" is a detail / expectation in the example that is well done.
A"Grow" is a detail / expectation in the example that needs improvement.
I need two grows and two glows from this blog below
The following are some of the main reasons to why phones are a negative impact on learning, and why they should be banned from schools and regulated at homes. Firstly, phones can be a distraction, due to things like constant notifications constantly drawing attention away from work. There are also the various games installed, which the indulgent of could result in students becoming lost in the game and having time pass and class end without them even realising. Secondly, due to both the rate of cyberbullying and how widespread social media is, phones in school could result in students being to upset and unable to focus on work. That, and they could also get into arguments with their friends or significant other(s) more easily, and thus put more focus on their personal life than their work due to it being more accessible.
Thirdly, phones are not limited to schools, obviously, as students most likely own their own phone, and bring them from home. Without limits in place by their parents, they will let their phones distract them from doing homework as well. Finally, for now, students for the most part don’t really want to do school work, and so use their phones to cruise through. At this point, the student hardly cares, if at all, about their work, and thus simply prefers to get it done as fast as possible, while learning almost nothing. As a result of all of these factors combined, students learn less and less, and thus their grades typically fall dramatically.
Now it is time to show the benefits of having phones allowed in school, and then thoroughly tear them apart. Firstly, phones could let students have access to the internet, and with it, sources of knowledge like news stories, blog posts, and magazine articles and the like. These and more are valuable sources of knowledge that can help students greatly, especially the case in history and writing courses. However, school computers and libraries can provide the same results, and are more easily monitored, allowing the school to better prevent cheating. That, and textbooks are still a viable method of teaching students and providing information. Thus, students using their phones as a source of knowledge should be a last resort, only if the school fails to provide alternatives due to any number of reasons.
Secondly, phones as a classroom resource allow for a number of benefits for teaching students about how to function in modern society. They can help students learn the necessary tech skills needed to function and contribute to modern society. They can also be a means to teach the basics of digital citizenship, helping students to learn what is socially acceptable and legal on the internet. However, this is still mostly unnecessary for learning these skills, as they can be learned on other digital equipment. For the same reasons as the first paragraph, if the school can provide the necessary equipment, then they should have no need for students to have phones on campus.
Now, we will be talking about the last two bits of evidence that have been brought to my attention. Continuing from part one, fifthly, is that phones in the classroom cause the teacher to struggle to do their job. If a student is watching videos or playing games during class, then it is a sign of disrespect to the teacher, and also undermines their authority in the eyes of the other students. And lastly, for real this time, use of phones during a student’s collage/university years could harm their chances at a prosperous future. Due to the fact that you need to go to college and have an education to “succeed” in modern society, overuse and over-reliance on phones can negatively affect a students education, mental and physical health, and their futures.
In the end, phones in educational environments have proven to be a source of educational and developmental hindrance and detriment. As has been discussed previously, phones are a distraction from school work, either by the forms of entertainment installed on it, or the increased accessibility to friends, family and social media, with the latter having the potential to negatively affect students mental health. Phones can also be used as a means of students cheating at their work, both at school and at home, and can be used as a means of escape by disinterested students, either slacking off or using the phone to solve the problems for them, ensuring they learn nothing. While phones can be used as easy access to needed information not readily accessible, and provide a means to acquire much-needed skills to contribute to modern society, the school should only allow this if they are unable to supply much safer and more easily monitored school owned equipment like computers or textbooks/Ebooks. Finally, phones can affect the lives of both teacher and student, the former by undermining their respect and authority with the students, and the latter by being capable of negatively affecting their health and future.
Glow: The author provides specific examples of how phones can be a distraction from school work, such as constant notifications and games installed on the phone.
Grow: The author could provide more evidence or examples to support their claim that phones can negatively affect students' mental health, as this is an important aspect to consider in the overall argument.
Glow: The author acknowledges that phones can be used as a source of knowledge, allowing students access to news stories, blog posts, and other valuable resources.
Grow: The author could explore more potential benefits of using phones as a classroom resource beyond teaching tech skills and digital citizenship, in order to strengthen their argument for allowing phones in schools.
differnt grows
Grow: The author could provide more evidence to support the claim that phones can lead to increased rates of cyberbullying, as this is an important aspect to consider in the argument for banning phones from schools.
Grow: The author could address potential counterarguments or alternative perspectives regarding the benefits of allowing phones in schools, in order to present a more balanced and comprehensive view of the topic.