Please edit this writing. There are several errors. Also, evaluate the writing, style, spelling and content of this writing piece.
The Alberta oil sands are being developed at an unprecedented rate for oil extraction. Consequently there is a great deal of environmental degradation, habitat fragmentation and negative impacts to both wildlife populations and human health. These impacts include heavy metal toxicity such as mercury in fish, human and other trophic level feeders through bioaccumulation. Arsenic, copper, lead and there compounds are contaminants of concern. Organic contaminants include PAHs and other persistent organic pollutants. Metabolized aromatic hydrocarbons are especially a concern for human health. Air emissions are concerning as a toxic release caused several school children from a local school to seek medical treatment from acute affects of NOx and SOx. Additional concerns include hydrology and terrain changes to the landscape resulting in severe population declines for both muskrat and the Species at Risk woodland caribou. This environmental concern should be addressed through legislative changes and enforcement to the Species at Risk Act, and the Environmental Protection and Clean Water Acts.
The Alberta oil sands are currently undergoing rapid development for oil extraction, which has resulted in significant environmental degradation, habitat fragmentation, and negative effects on both wildlife populations and human health. There are multiple impacts associated with this development, including the presence of heavy metals like mercury in fish and other organisms due to bioaccumulation. Contaminants of concern also include arsenic, copper, lead, and their respective compounds. Furthermore, there are organic contaminants such as PAHs (polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons) and other persistent organic pollutants. Of particular concern for human health are metabolized aromatic hydrocarbons. Additionally, air emissions are a cause for concern, as a toxic release led to several school children from a local school requiring medical treatment for the acute effects of NOx (nitrogen oxides) and SOx (sulfur oxides). Other significant concerns involve changes to hydrology and terrain, which have resulted in a severe decline in population for both muskrats and the woodland caribou, a species at risk.
In terms of evaluating the writing style, the piece provides a clear and concise overview of the environmental impacts associated with oil sands development in Alberta. The author employs scientific terminology effectively to convey the severity of the situation. However, there are a few areas that require attention in terms of spelling, grammar, and content organization.
Regarding spelling, there should be a correction made in the phrase "arsenic, copper, lead and there compounds." The word "there" should be changed to "their."
Additionally, the content could be better organized into distinct paragraphs to improve readability and flow. For example, separating the discussion of heavy metal toxicity and organic contaminants into separate paragraphs would enhance clarity.
Regarding content, it would be beneficial to provide a more comprehensive assessment of the impacts on human health, such as detailing the specific health risks associated with heavy metal toxicity and aromatic hydrocarbons. Additionally, expanding on the legislative changes and enforcement needed to address these concerns, as mentioned in the conclusion, would enhance the completeness of the analysis.
Taking these suggestions into account, the revised paragraph would read as follows:
The Alberta oil sands are currently being developed at an unprecedented rate for oil extraction, resulting in significant environmental degradation, habitat fragmentation, and negative impacts on both wildlife populations and human health. These impacts include heavy metal toxicity, such as mercury in fish and other organisms, resulting from bioaccumulation. Contaminants of concern include arsenic, copper, lead, and their compounds. Organic contaminants, such as PAHs and other persistent organic pollutants, pose additional risks. Metabolized aromatic hydrocarbons are particularly concerning for human health. Furthermore, air emissions are a significant issue, as a toxic release led to several school children from a local school seeking medical treatment for acute effects of NOx and SOx. Changes to hydrology and terrain have also severely impacted populations of muskrats and the woodland caribou, a species at risk. Addressing these environmental concerns requires legislative changes and a stronger enforcement of acts such as the Species at Risk Act and the Environmental Protection and Clean Water Acts.