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Grammar and Composition Bobpursley

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i put this post up at 2:21, i don't think you saw it:

alright. i only have two things to point out. first, in Paragraph #4, 'Explain how the THIRD POINT is developed in this paragraph.' you said 'it does mention yard and flowers and pool' but that is paragraph 3 not 4. 4 mentions his actions and behavior.

so please check that

and second, for for Paragraph #5, conclusion in the first thing to fill out it says does the FIRST SENTENCE RESTATE THE THESIS OR NOT. here is my sentence 'John E. Mackintosh’s life is that of a typical businessman because he dresses in expensive clothing, lives and drives in style, and survives in a busy life' and i think it does restate the thesis.

that's all

thank you so much for doing this for me

  • Grammar and Composition Bobpursley -

    On the last, your thesis did not say anything about businessman,you said he was rich. So we disagree on that.

    On the first, you are right, I numbered the paragraphs on my printout,and the spaces separating the paragraphs did not print. I see now. The third point, in paragraph 4, does cover behavior, but does seem to lack detail. It is written without vivid words. It needs charging up.

    sorry about the numbering, My first post was lost, and I had to reconstruct it from my printed notes.

  • Grammar and Composition Bobpursley -

    ok thanks. i will continue working on this tomorrow.

    thanks again for all you time

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