English Improving writing

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please take a look at this thanks



Prewriting
Paragraph 1
The problem is Jack and Rachel often have nothing to do
Bonnie and Molly are working extra and have to work over time
Melanie and Jessica share an administrative assistant
Larry's assistant only works 15 hours
The company is not working as well as it can
There is friction between the staff Bonnie and Molly feel that they are not being treat fairly
Victor and David are forgotten completely.
Paragraph 2
Jack and Rachel could help out the Bonnie and Molly so they do not have to work over time
Try and split the work more evenly
Maybe get rid of Larry’s assistant who works only 15 hours
Is Larry’s assistant willing to work more than 15 hours per week
The administrative assistant can maybe do less of Melanie and Jessica’s work
We have 125 people in our company train a few people in the other office so they can help out
Have the full time administrative assistant help out Samuel and Frank Daly who have no assistant
Others solutions that I considered but discarded include the following. Hiring a few people from Tina’s temp agency but that would only be a quick fix. Cut back on employees paid time off but that may cause the employee to not work as hard as they can.Maybe this job is something you can't handle because look at the mess we are in

Paragraph 3
I have many years working with the public
been at the company for a long time
the uneven productivity has a bad impact on the company
may lose clients if problem is not fixed soon
giving the company a bad name
morale is getting low
company finances is slowly sinking
this problem has been going on for over a month
Hiring extra help in the long run will improve efficiency
if the employees do not feel stressed they will do better at their jobs which will increase company morale

  • English Improving writing -

    I remember answering this once before. It's fine. Good prewriting as you were instructed.

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