English

How is the best way to write the explaination on the changes that you would make to revise the paper. I know what needs to be corrected, but I am not sure how to word it in a paragraph.

The Dark Knight was the most popular film of 2008. Unlike most popular summer movies it was also considered to be a quality film and was thought to be a contender to earn an academy award nomination. Ultimately that honor was not bestowed on the film, but it’s popularity and ability to elevate the comic book film, which is rarely associated with quality storytelling, remain.
The film is a continuation of the direction that Batman Begins took. It showed a darker version of Batman than the one seen in the Timothy Burton and Joel Shumacher films. The core unit responsible for Batman Begins also made The Dark Knight. Specifically the director, Christopher Nolan, the writer David S. Goyer and the stars such as Christian Bale, Gary Oldmand, and Michael Caine all played a role in both of the films with the only exception being Maggie Gyllenhall replacing Katie Holmes and Heath Ledger playing the Joker in one of his last roles, which will be remembered as an excellent performance and one which earned him an academy award after he had passed away.
What makes The Dark Knight fairly unique among comic book movies is the focus on acting and storytelling. The acting is impressive across the boards. Bale, Oldman, Ledger, Caine, Morgan Freeman, and Aaron Eckhardt all excel in their roles. Unlike most comic book movies the actors are given moments to showcase their acting abilities.
The cinematography followed the look established in Batman Begins by using subdued colors, lots of darkness and a more restrained visual style than the one seen in the late 80s and 90s. In many ways the new style of the two more recent Batman films can be seen as an attempt, which at this point must be considered succesful, to distance the franchise from the negative connotations that Batman and Robin had.
Wikipedia wrote the following about the film: It was greeted with positive reviews upon release, and became only the second film to earn more than $500 million at the North American box office, setting numerous other records in the process. It is also the fourth highest grossing film worldwide and only the fourth film to earn more than $1 billion, worldwide.
In conclusion, I hope that you have enjoyed this paper and take the opportunity to see the movie soon. You will enjoy it.

  1. 👍 0
  2. 👎 0
  3. 👁 295
  1. In a list, tell us what you think needs changing.

  2. The Dark Knight was the most popular film of 2008(this should have a rating instead of saying it was the most popular). Unlike most popular summer movies it was also considered to be a quality film and was thought to be a contender to earn an academy award nomination. Ultimately that honor was not bestowed on the film, but it’s(do not use contracions, spell out the words) popularity and ability to elevate the comic book film, which is rarely associated with quality storytelling, remain.
    The film is a continuation of the direction that Batman Begins took. It Write "the movie" instead of "it") showed a darker version of Batman than the one seen in the Timothy Burton and Joel Shumacher films. The core unit responsible for Batman Begins also made The Dark Knight. Specifically the director, Christopher Nolan, the writer David S. Goyer and the stars such as Christian Bale, Gary Oldmand, and Michael Caine all played a role in both of the films with the only exception being Maggie Gyllenhall replacing Katie Holmes and Heath Ledger playing the Joker in one of his last roles, which will be remembered as an excellent performance(insert a comma) and one which earned him an academy award after he had passed away ( this is a run on and needs to be split into multiple sentences).
    What makes The Dark Knight fairly unique among comic book movies is the focus on acting and storytelling. The acting is impressive across the boards. Bale, Oldman, Ledger, Caine, Morgan Freeman, and Aaron Eckhardt all excel in their roles. Unlike most comic book movies the actors are given moments to showcase their acting abilities.
    The cinematography followed the look established in Batman Begins by using subdued colors, lots( write "a lot of" instead of "lots") of darkness and a more restrained visual style than the one seen in the late 80s and 90s. In many ways the new style of the two more recent Batman films can be seen as an attempt, which at this point must be considered succesful( spelling error), to distance the franchise from the negative connotations that Batman and Robin had.
    Wikipedia wrote the following about the film: It was greeted with positive reviews upon release, and became only the second film to earn more than $500 million at the North American box office, setting numerous other records in the process. It(write "this movie" instead of "it") is also the fourth highest grossing film worldwide and only the fourth film to earn more than $1 billion, worldwide(this needs reworded because it is a direct quote).
    In conclusion, I hope that you have enjoyed this paper and take the opportunity to see the movie soon. You will enjoy it. ( the conclusion sentence needs to be stronger.

    I have listed the errors in prentices

    1. 👍 0
    2. 👎 0
  3. punctuation

    sentence structure

    word choice

    development of conclusion (http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/endings.htm )

    I'd write a paragraph in which I concentrated on the three elements above (use the examples you have indicated), plus the need for a stronger conclusion.

    Once you have written up your paragraph, please repost, and we'll check it for you.

  4. The most common error I have been making lately is to indent the first line of each paragraph. This was completed in the writing of the student. In the writing I would like the rating of the movie while playing in theaters instead on saying it was the most popular. There are a few punctuation errors in the essay that need to be corrected. Sentence structure needs to be address for example there are a few run on sentences that need to be corrected. The right word choice is important in writing, for example spell out words such as it’s. A stronger conclusion is needed because it needs to recap the introduction paragraph but with a little more detail.

    1. 👍 0
    2. 👎 0
  5. The most common error I have been making lately is to indent the first line of each paragraph. This was completed in the writing of the student. This is extremely unimportant; I'd leave it out.

    In the paragraph, the specific rating of the movie needs to be stated instead of just saying it was the most popular. <~~This needs to be phrased more specifically and without awkward wording, such as "instead on saying..."

    There are a few punctuation errors in the essay that need to be corrected. <~~such as what?

    Sentence structure needs to be address for example there are a few run on sentences that need to be corrected. <~~I saw only one run-on. Did you see more? And this, in itself, is a run-on!

    The right word choice is important in writing,<~~another run-on for example spell out words such as it’s. Spelling and word choice are two completely different things. Don't put them together.

    A stronger conclusion is needed because it needs to recap the introduction paragraph but with a little more detail. <~~This is good.

  6. How does this look~

    Make sure that the first sentence of every paragraph is indented. The rating of the movie should be listed instead of stating it was the most popular movie because it would need more documentation proving that statement. There are a few punctuation errors in the essay that need to be corrected such as comma usage. Sentence structure needs to be address, such as, run on sentences that need to be corrected. Choosing the right words are important in writing because you do not want your reader to think it is a direct quote without providing evidence of the quote. Checking spelling errors is very important, and spell out words instead of using a contraction. A stronger conclusion is needed because it needs to recap the introduction paragraph but with a little more detail.

    1. 👍 0
    2. 👎 0
  7. Sentence structure needs to be address<~~verb form is incorrect; use "addressed", such as,<~~delete comma run on sentences that need to be corrected. Choosing the right words are<~~needs to be singular because the subject "choosing" is singular important in writing because you do not want your reader to think it is a direct quote without providing evidence of the quote. <~~How did you get from word choice to correct citation of quotations? Those are two different problems. Checking spelling errors is very important, and spell out words instead of using a contraction. A stronger conclusion is needed because it needs to recap the introduction paragraph but with a little more detail.

  8. I am having trouble coming up with 25 more words

    1. 👍 0
    2. 👎 0
  9. You have stated the changes only in general terms. You haven't included any specific examples. You should not have problems with word count if you include specific examples.

  10. One last time~

    Make sure that the first sentence of every paragraph is indented. The rating of the movie should be listed instead of stating it was the most popular movie because it would need more documentation proving that statement. There are a few punctuation errors in the essay that need to be corrected such as comma usage before the word and. Sentence structure needs to be addressed, such as run on sentences that need to be corrected. Choosing the right words can be tricky but it is important in writing. For example, when referring to the movie, do not refer to it as “it”. Be more specific by saying, “The movie was good”, instead of “It was good”. It needs to describe something. You should stay away from direct quotes without providing evidence of the quote. Checking spelling errors is very important, and spell out words instead of using a contraction. Avoid using second person writing, for example you. In the sentence “You will enjoy it”, try replacing it with “to most the movie is enjoyable.” A stronger conclusion is needed because it needs to recap the introduction paragraph but with a little more detail. Also make sure you proofread your work. Having someone else look over your writing is a good way to find common errors that may have been overlooked.

    1. 👍 0
    2. 👎 0
  11. Good.

    Now ... can you follow your own advice? (It's good advice!!) Can you rephrase in places and get rid of "you"?

    =)

  12. how does the The character in “My Mother” feel?

    1. 👍 0
    2. 👎 0

Respond to this Question

First Name

Your Response

Similar Questions

  1. chemistry

    The initial concentration of a reactant in a first order reaction is 0.620 molar. What will be its concentration after 3 half-lives? a. 0.0388 M b. 0.310 M c. 0.0775 M d. 0.155M e. 4.96 M thinkin c if not need a really good

    asked by elvis on February 17, 2012
  2. Math

    My son's math homework asks him to find each product by factoring the tens. 6 x 2, 6 x 20 and 60 x 20. There is no explaination in the book..can you help?

    asked by Kelly on January 4, 2011
  3. physics

    A 200m long train crosses a 400m long bridge with a speed of 36km/hr . Calculate the time taken by train to cross the bridge? plz give me the answer with explaination

    asked by Maihul on July 6, 2012
  4. chemistry

    The following unbalanced equation describes the reaction that can occur when lead (II) sulfide reacts with oxygen gas to produce lead (II) oxide and sulfur dioxide gas: PbS + O2  PbO + SO2. all i need help on is explaination of

    asked by amtonio on January 17, 2017
  1. science

    CHOOSE ANY DISNEY MOVIE TO MAKE THIS DIORAMA. MAKE A 3D MODEL OF PLAINS, PLATEAU AND MOUNTAINS AND WRITE 5 PARAGRAPHS ABOUT THESE THREE LANDFORMS. PLEASE HELP ME. THANK YOU.

    asked by JACK on September 23, 2008
  2. Chemistry

    My problem states the mass of the electron is 9.10939 x10-31kg. It wants me to express the mass of the electron to 1, 2, 3, and 4 significant figures. I don't need just the answer but an explaination on how to arrive at the

    asked by Sheronda on September 14, 2009
  3. chem

    K2CO3 is an excellent drying agent for some classes of organic compounds. would it be a better choice for an acid (RCO2H)or an amine(RNH2)? why? i know this is RNH2. could it be explained that potassium carbonate itself is basic

    asked by Jason on October 28, 2008
  4. algebra

    What is the last two digit of 3243^8897 + 6574^2314 ? pls give me the explaination as well:) thank you.

    asked by vj19 on October 5, 2013
  1. St.Nicholas Adult High School (English)

    the sentence'15%of adult height is added during teen years." Ineed response and explaination. I'am so confused about that question.

    asked by Mary on January 17, 2011
  2. pre-algebra, math

    You make and sell birdhouses. Your fixed costs for your tools and workspace are $3000. The cost of wood and other materials needed to make a birdhouse is $10. You sell each birdhouse for $50. Let x represent the number of

    asked by kms on May 18, 2017
  3. Physics

    If the speed of a car is doubled, the work to stop the car changes by a factor of so it's 4....but I cannot think of how I know it is double. Any explaination?

    asked by mssailormouth on June 20, 2019
  4. Math

    A) Write a numerator for each fraction to make the fraction close to, but not equal to, 1/2. Then, write another numerator to make each fraction close to, but greater than 1. 1) _/22 2) _/43 3) _/17 My Answers: 1) 10, I believe.

    asked by Charlie on November 13, 2017

You can view more similar questions or ask a new question.