English

Can you check these sentences I wrote on Robinson Crusoe? Thank you very much.


1) When Crusoe woke up, he found the weather clear and the storm over. The ship had been carried by the tide almost to the shore.
2) He began to wish to board the ship so that he could save some of the things that he could later use.
3) Later, at the tide's ebb, he found that he was within a quarter of a mile from the ship and he realized that if they had all stayed on board that they would all have been safe .
4) This distressed him so much that he began to cry, but he quickly quit and began to make plans to get to the ship.
5) After surmounting many difficulties in getting to the ship, he pulled himself up by means of a hanging rope. He went into the ship’s cabin.
6) There was a great deal of water in the ship’s hold. But the cabin and the storerooms were dry. He searched for all the unspoiled provisions.
7) The boxes of food had not been damaged by the water. He found many things, including biscuits and rum, which he wanted to take ashore.

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asked by Henry1
  1. All acceptable. #2 might be a little less stilted with "that he could use later. (adverbs often go after the verb)

    #3 could use a comma after quit and before and "he quickly quit, and began to make..."

    Sra

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  2. 2 would be smoother if you simplified it a little: He wished he could board the ship so he could save some of the useful things.

    3 ... within a quarter of a mile of the ship, and he realized that if they had all stayed on board, they would have been safe.
    (to reduce wordiness and to get the comma in there)

    6 ... in the ship's hold, but the ...

    Everything else is fine.

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