below will be a grade 4 student paragraph about family. As the teacher use 80 to 100 words to assess the strengths and weaknesses and outline at least one recommendation for improvement of the child’s writing proficiency.
I am going to tell you about my family my father works two jobs one at amazon and a next job but I don't remember the job's name. My mother is a principal and has a school she is a hard working person and is loving too. I love her very much. Then you have my little brother he is my favourite person in my family right now he is very cute, funny and rude that why he is my favourite. That is my I love tell very much.
Strengths:
- The student effectively gives a brief description of each family member and their occupation, showing an understanding of the concept of family.
- The student uses simple language and conveys a sense of love and appreciation for each family member.
Weaknesses:
- The paragraph lacks cohesion and organization, jumping from one family member to the next without clear transitions.
- There are several grammatical errors, such as missing punctuation and incorrect word usage ("that is my I love tell very much").
Recommendation for Improvement:
- The student should work on improving the organization of the paragraph by including clear transitions between each family member's description.
- The student should also focus on improving grammar and punctuation skills for clearer and more effective communication.