hey random but I turn 13 oct 1 and my dad wants to take me to new york but my mom can't come and ik if I go she's gonna be sad and probably hate me and if I dont go my dad is gonna be sad I did want to go anywhere with him and iv always wanted to ride in a plane and go to New York but I dont wanna hurt anyone feelings so do I go and make myself happy or dont and be sad on my bd?
It can be difficult when we find ourselves torn between wanting to make ourselves happy and being concerned about how our decisions might affect others. In this situation, it's important to remember that you're not responsible for other people's emotions. It's natural for your mom to feel sad about not being able to be there with you, but it doesn't mean she'll hate you or that it's your fault.
Having said that, you might consider talking to both your parents and expressing your desire to go to New York with your dad. Let them know how much it means to you and that you understand your mom's feelings too. While it's understandable that your dad might also feel sad if you don't go, it's important to prioritize your own happiness on your birthday.
Open communication can help create understanding and might make it easier for everyone involved. Remember, it's your special day, and it's okay to do something that makes you happy.
my mom said for me to go even tho she might be sad but idk if I wanna risk hurting her feelings she also said that I shouldn't worry about everyone else's felling
It sounds like your mom is understanding and supportive of you going to New York with your dad, even though she might feel a little sad. It's great that she's encouraging you to prioritize your own happiness. Sometimes, making decisions that benefit us may involve acknowledging that others may have mixed feelings about it. Remember that your mom's feelings are her own responsibility, and it's not your job to manage them or make her happy all the time.
If your mom is giving you permission to go and reassures you not to worry about everyone else's feelings, it might be worth considering taking this opportunity to make yourself happy and fulfill your dream of going to New York. Of course, it's essential to have a respectful conversation with your mom and express your gratitude for her understanding. Communication plays a key role in maintaining healthy relationships, so keep talking and understanding each other's perspectives.
Balancing family dynamics and individual happiness can be challenging, but it's important to remember that you deserve to enjoy your birthday. Here is a step-by-step approach to help you make a decision:
1. Consider your parents' feelings: Recognize that both your mom and dad want to make you happy. Acknowledge your mom's potential sadness but remember that she would want you to enjoy your birthday.
2. Express your feelings: Have an open conversation with both your parents. Share your excitement about going to New York with your dad, while also acknowledging your concerns about your mom feeling sad.
3. Discuss possible solutions: Explore alternatives that may help ease any potential sadness your mom may experience. Can you plan a special celebration with your mom before or after the trip? Could you arrange a special day together once you return from New York?
4. Communicate with empathy: Ensure your parents know that while you want to go to New York, you also care about their feelings. Encourage an open dialogue where everyone can express their emotions and work towards a solution that minimizes hurt feelings.
5. Seek a compromise: If possible, try to find a middle ground that allows you to go to New York while also considering your mom's feelings. This compromise could involve additional quality time with her or any other compromise that works for your family dynamic.
Remember, it's impossible to please everyone all the time, but open communication, understanding, and empathy can help alleviate some of the guilt and sadness surrounding your decision.
It's understandable that you're in a tough situation and you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Balancing relationships can be challenging, but here are a few steps to help you make a decision:
1. Talk to your parents: Communicate openly with both your mom and dad about your concerns and how you feel torn between their two desires. Express your desire to spend time with your dad and visit New York while also acknowledging your worry about hurting your mom's feelings.
2. Seek a compromise: Consider discussing the possibility of celebrating your birthday with each of your parents separately. For instance, you can plan a special trip with your dad to New York on a different date, or find another way to spend quality time together.
3. Consider your mom's perspective: Put yourself in your mom's shoes and try to understand her feelings. While it's natural to want to make your dad happy, acknowledging your mom's emotions is important too. Discussing your concerns with her may help you find a solution that works for everyone.
4. Evaluate your priorities: Think about what will genuinely make you happy on your birthday. Reflect on your long-standing desire to visit New York and ride on a plane. Consider whether this experience will bring you joy that offsets any potential sadness or guilt.
5. Seek support: Talk to a trusted adult, such as a family member, teacher, or counselor, who can offer guidance and help you navigate this situation. They can provide an outside perspective and support you in making a decision that feels right for you.
Remember, the most important thing is to communicate openly and honestly with both your parents. By expressing your feelings and concerns, you can work together to find a solution that respects everyone's emotions.