Memorable Letter Evaluation (Writeacher)

Write a letter to your parents about a memorable moment in your life. Be sure to use imagery.

I tried to use imagery, as instructed, but not wordiness.

What I written:

"First arriving at Girl’s Camp has become one of the most memorable moments of my life. What I had been told about the campsite hardly even described its beauty. Yes, the road was just as rough and nauseating, but every inch of the campsite teemed with life. Tall trees, bushes, and boulders jostled for position. Small rocks littered the ground, forming streams whenever it rained in the pathways between them. Various kinds of birds soared alongside one another, weaving their way through the subtle clouds. At night, the Milky Way replaced them, shining luminously against the dark sky. In the mornings, however, the sun shone even brighter, its rays reflecting upon the surface of the great lake.
From my position on Inspiration Point, a cliff high enough to view most of the campsite, the beauty of nature overwhelmed me; I have never seen such beauty in one of God’s creations. These sights completely mesmerized me. Thus, I know whenever my gaze sets upon a tree or at the stars above, I will remember the beauty here. I will always remember it."

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  1. The letter begins with "Dear Mom and Dad."

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  2. You also have to have a closing.

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  3. I do.

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  4. If I were your parents, I would be more interested in how you felt vs what you saw, and how it affected your life, not the beauty there.
    Parents did not send you there to send back picture postcards. They want to know the impact, and why you remember it.

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    bobpursley

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