posted by anonymous .
What is the thesis statement in this essay?
Instead of using emails, mail a letter to your grandparents, an aunt or uncle, or another role model who’s older than you are. We live in a fast-paced world. We use computers to send emails and instant messages. Some, though, don’t live in that time zone. Forget all the fonts, emoticons, and abbreviations like LOL. You point and click, but some people want to hold something, unwrap a letter, and smell it. A crayoned picture smells and feels special; no scanner can do that. People’s senses want to be used. We live in a physical world, not a digital one. People can touch some- thing that’s mailed. Sometimes it’s as if touching the ink or pencil on paper helps them touch the writer. A picture can be held and used in so many ways. For example, I get to see how my grand- kids’ handwriting is changing as they grow. I know how they feel just from the way they write the words.
A letter gives someone the real thing. A letter exists in time and space. Even if someone emails you regularly, the surprise of a mailed letter provides something to cherish rather than to be deleted. Of course, family and friends may like getting through the Internet a photograph of you on the day of a special event. However, a printed photograph can be put into an album or used for a bookmark or posted on the refrigerator for regular review. They don’t have to worry about color cartridges or paper because you’ve given them what they need in the mail. Though they may have a hard time reading your handwriting, a letter is a tangible way to remind them that you care enough to take the time and effort to communicate with them and them alone.
The convenience and efficiency of computers can’t be matched by regular postal service. However, they sometimes bleep and blurp in a frustrating conversation, one that older persons can’t always hear or understand. One wrong click here and another there can mean mass destruction. They may get a paper cut from your letter, but even sucking on a finger while reading makes their experience more memorable and satisfying. The cut heals; the letter remains alive.
Is there a clear thesis statement? Are there paragraphs with topic sentences?
Has the author provided enough evidence to support the main idea of their essay?
Are the author's points organized well enough for the reader to follow easily?
Can you clearly identify the audience and the purpose of the essay?
It's very hard to tell.
But the real point is that YOU NEED TO TELL US what YOU THINK the answer to each of these questions is. Someone here might be able to check your answers.
I have to write a paragraph for each question. There are 4 questions in total.
1.) Purpose and audience- Can you clearly identify the audience and the purpose of the essay?
2.) Thesis statement, topic sentences, and paragraphs- Is there a clear thesis statement? Are there paragraphs with topic sentences?
3.) Evidence- Has the author provided enough evidence to support the main idea of the essay?
4.) Organization- Are the author's points organized well enough for a reader to follow easily?
I've answered number one already. This is what I have:
The author's purpose is to persuade. In my opinion, he or she did a great job with persuading the audience. Their audience is younger people, or teenagers. The author is trying to state that teenagers should send letters in the mail rather than online. However, he or she writes about sending them to grandparents, aunts, and uncles. This confused me while reading the rest of the essay because it seems as though the author is writing about grandparents for the remainder of the essay. I would correct this and completely take out the part involving aunts and uncles. I agree with the author's decision to write about grandparents. However, aunts and uncles typically know how to use a computer, whereas grandparents typically do not.
I'm having trouble with number two, that's why I posted it on here asking for help. I'm terrible with thesis sentences and don't even know how to start on finding it. Number two is preventing me from answering the other two questions. I need to have this turned in today and I'm having a lot of trouble.
Can someone help me understand this please?
This looks like the thesis sentence:
"Instead of using emails, mail a letter to your grandparents, an aunt or uncle, or another role model who’s older than you are. "
That's what I was thinking too, but I think the author can make it better. I'm just not that great at thesis statements and don't know how to change it to make it better.
This site has excellent ideas for thesis statements.
Is this okay?
"Even though using the Internet to communicate with loved ones is faster, you should send letters in the mail."
Last question (sorry I'm asking so many but I'm ready to finish this already lol), Are the author's points organized well enough for a ready to follow easily? In my opinion, they are. I don't know what I would change in this one.
Thank you so much for all of your help :) I really appreciate it!
You're very welcome.