Biographical Essay Evaluation (Writeacher)
posted by Victoria .
How much more of the wordiness should I eliminate from my essay? I desperately want to receive an excellent grade for this assignment, but I can't if you refuse to read any more of my revisions. I don't want to bother you or make you upset, but I still need your help.
Should I remove all excessive adjectives from the second and third paragraphs? I know you already evaluated the second paragraph, but I don't know whether you thought it required more editing. Also, I don't know your thoughts about the third paragraph.
Both Bob Pursley and I have told you the same things, over and over, and I see little improvement. When I see writing by a student who is not addressing what has already been advised by two VERY different people, my best advice is that you turn in what you have and see what your teacher thinks. Who knows? Maybe your teacher will be okay with it all. The only way you'll find out is to do your best and turn it in.
I'm sorry, but I am trying. In fact, I recently researched different means to eliminate wordiness. Thus, I am revising my essay now. If I sumbitted it to you once more, will you still evaluate it?
Only once more ... That's all.