english

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I having problems these sentences on sentence fragments and run-on sentences, including both fused sentences and comma splices and how to revise them and explain the choices that have been made. This is the sentence:

When I was in high school I never thought that I would ever actually need to know how to construct a sentence. I remember diagramming sentences. Over and over again. I questioned if it really mattered if I knew how to use a comma. Because I was bored. No one will really care if I can’t use a semicolon, I will just pay someone to write for me. Now I know just how wrong I was I can’t even get a job no one will even look at my resume they can’t even understand my cover letters. So much for paying someone, to write for me. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.
Keep in mind that there is more than one way to fix each error! 8 points total.

here is my work so far:
When I was in high school I never thought that I would ever actually need to know how to construct a sentence. I remember diagramming sentences over and over again in order to understand the lesson. I questioned if it really mattered if I knew how to use a comma or not, because I was bored with comas. No one will really care if I can’t use a semicolon; I will just pay someone to write for me. Now I know just how wrong I was, I can’t even get a job, no one will even look at my resume, and they can’t even understand my cover letters. So much for paying someone, to write for me. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.

  • English -

    [Everything's fine up to this point. Focus on fixing run-ons from here on.]

    Now I know just how wrong I was, I can’t even get a job, no one will even look at my resume, and they can’t even understand my cover letters.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    [Focus on fixing fragments from here on.]

    So much for paying someone, to write for me. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.

  • english -

    here my work:

    When I was in high school I never thought that I would ever actually need to know how to construct a sentence. I remember diagramming sentences over and over again in order to understand the lesson. I questioned if it really mattered if I knew how to use a comma or not, because I was bored with comas. No one will really care if I can’t use a semicolon; I will just pay someone to write for me. Now I know just how wrong I was; I can’t even get a job, no one will even look at my resume, and they can’t even understand my cover letters. So much for paying someone to write for me, as well try it myself I might. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work, but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.

  • English -

    Now I know just how wrong I was;<~~It would be better to put a period there, not a semicolon. I can’t even get a job,<~~?? no one will even look at my resume, and they can’t even understand my cover letters. So much for paying someone to write for me, as well try it myself I might.<~~Not only is that a fragment of some kind, but it doesn't even make sense. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work, but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.

  • english -

    When I was in high school I never thought that I would ever actually need to know how to construct a sentence. I remember diagramming sentences over and over again in order to understand the lesson. I questioned if it really mattered if I knew how to use a comma or not, because I was bored with comas. No one will really care if I can’t use a semicolon; I will just pay someone to write for me. Now I know just how wrong I was; I can’t even get a job. No one will even look at my resume, and they can’t even understand my cover letters. So much for paying someone to write for me, I might as well try it myself. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work, but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.

  • english -

    So much for paying someone to write for me, I might as well try it myself.

    That is still not a complete sentence, and if you make the first part a full sentence, but leave the comma, you'll create another run-on (comma splice).

  • english -

    Sentence Workshop:
    Correcting Sentence Fragments and Run-on Sentences
    After completing this worksheet, post your responses to the week 1, assignment 4 Discussion Area. Review and comment on the work of at least 2 other students by the end of the week. Use this as an opportunity not simply to correct one another, but to discuss the topics at hand and to troubleshoot these specific areas for improvement.
    Grading Criteria
    Maximum Points
    One point per correct answer
    Responded constructively to the work of at least two students and actively participated in discussion.
    8
    4
    Total:
    12
    The following paragraph contains sentence fragments and run-on sentences, including both fused sentences and comma splices. Please revise the paragraph to correct the errAors. Then, for each revision that you make, explain the choices that you have made.
    When I was in high school I never thought that I would ever actually need to know how to construct a sentence. I remember diagramming sentences over and over again in order to understand the lesson. I questioned if it really mattered if I knew how to use a comma or not, because I was bored with comas. No one will really care if I can’t use a semicolon; I will just pay someone to write for me. Now I know just how wrong I was; I can’t even get a job. No one will even look at my resume, and they can’t even understand my cover letters. I might as well try it myself so much for paying someone to write for me. Now I am doing my best to understand how these things work, but I really wish I had paid more attention the first time.

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