English

posted by .

i need the intro paragrpah below proofread, i am trying to prove that building empires is ultrantionalist and that it is wrong:


Imperialism can benefit one’s country. Empires can be built by securing resources; however, the building of empires has essential led to many wars throughout history. Some believe that empires are needed and inevitable. These people would be considered ultranationalist. Others believe that Empires are dangerous and are the cause of many unnecessary wars. These people are internationalist as they are trying to promote global peace. Clearly, the ultranationalism of building an empire is wrong and should be avoided.

  • English -

    Since this is an introductory paragraph, I assume your thesis is your last sentence.

    As I responded below, you shouldn't mention any postives of empires, certainly not in your introductory paragraph.

    In addition, your introductory paragraph should be the last part of your paper to write. Write the body parts first -- then come back and introduce your paper in your introduction.

Respond to this Question

First Name
School Subject
Your Answer

Similar Questions

  1. English

    I need intro paragraph proofread and edited please source used for intro paragraph : empire demands discipline, the coordination of all forces and a deeply felt sense of duty and sacrifice: this fact explains many aspects of the practical …
  2. English

    i need the body paragraph below edited and proofread please, i am trying to prove that empires are wrong. Some people believe that the building of empire provides a secure natural resource due to taking over territories owned by other …
  3. English

    I need my intro and body paragraph proofread please,for the body paragraph i am supposed to talk about arguments made by the other side and trash it. Imperialism can benefit one’s country. Empires can be built by securing resources; …
  4. English

    i need this body paragraph edited please Various people believe that the building of an empire provides secure natural resources due to taking over territories owned by other countries. This ultra-nationalism can actually create a …
  5. English

    Imperialism can benefit one’s country. Empires can be built by securing resources; however, the building of empires has essentially led to many wars throughout history. Some believe that empires are needed and inevitable. These people …
  6. English

    this is an intro for an argumentative essay, the thesis for the essay is supposed to be that empires are bad..i need help in bringing that out better ( will be forever happy if it rewritten) empires are needed and inevitable. These …
  7. English

    Need help proofreading and editing this body paragraph this is the last body paragraph for my essay, we are supposed to write about solutions other than building empires. The Ultra-nationalism of building an empire is not the right …
  8. English Grammar

    need help with the editing of this paragraph. Various people believe that the building of an Empire provides secure natural resources from taking over territories claimed by other countries. This Ultra-Nationalism can actually begin …
  9. world history

    Which statement applies to BOTH the maurya and the Gupta empires?
  10. Empires

    I need help to compare and contrast the Babylonian and Hittite empires

More Similar Questions