poetry/essay help

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Hello! I wrote an essay comparing and contrasting Anglo-Saxon vernacular riddles and Emily Dickinson literary poetry. Since my essay is 9 pages long, can someone just look over my intro and conclusion. Those are the two I'm having trouble with. If someone is kind enough to look over the whole essay, that would be greatly appreciated also. Thanks!

here's the intro:
Do vernacular riddle-poems share the same stylistic approach and complex analysis of the literary poetry? By examining “The Whistling Swan” and “The Magpie,” vernacular riddles translated from the Exeter Book, and comparing them to Emily Dickinson’s literary poem about an angleworm, we are able to determine if vernacular literature should be considered significant among the art of poetry. If, according to Immanuel Kant, poetry fortifies and frees our minds, do these riddles satisfy the same intentions? Emily Dickinson frees our minds by defamiliarizing the world and her intent encourages a different perspective on life, but can vernacular poems do the same? The artistic devices and intended analysis of these Anglo-Saxon riddles are identical to those used in the poetry of Emily Dickinson; therefore, revealing that vernacular and literary poetry share a relative value in fortifying and freeing the mind.
And the conclusion:

The interpretations of the Anglo-Saxon vernacular riddles and the literary poems by Emily Dickinson challenge the audience to fortify and free their minds. Dickinson suggests that humans have an interconnected relationship with creatures and each individual serves a higher purpose. This challenges the audience to contemplate their position in context of this world. This interpretation of challenging the audience and the expectations of poetry can also be seen in the Anglo-Saxon riddles. By using the first person narrative in “The Whistling Swan” and “The Magpie,” the reader is experiencing an unfamiliar world through an animal. The effortless transformation into an animal suggests an underrated relationship between human and creature. One must free the mind of objectivity to truly experience this transformation. By comparing these three pieces, we find that vernacular and literary poetry shares the same intention of challenging our minds to gain perspective on our world.

here's the intro:

Do vernacular riddle-poems share the same stylistic approach and complex analysis of the literary poetry? By examining "The Whistling Swan" and "The Magpie," vernacular riddles translated from the Exeter Book, and comparing them to Emily Dickinson's literary poem about an angleworm, we are able to determine if vernacular literature should be considered significant among the art of poetry. If, according to Immanuel Kant, poetry fortifies and frees our minds, do these riddles satisfy the same intentions? Emily Dickinson frees our minds by defamiliarizing<~~I hope that, somewhere in your paper, you explain this term! the world<~~add comma and her intent encourages a different perspective on life, but can vernacular poems do the same? The artistic devices and intended analysis of these Anglo-Saxon riddles are identical to those used in the poetry of Emily Dickinson;<~~delete semicolon, add comma therefore,<~~delete comma revealing that vernacular and literary poetry share a relative value in fortifying and freeing the mind.


The interpretations of the Anglo-Saxon vernacular riddles and the literary poems by Emily Dickinson challenge the audience to fortify and free their minds<~~I hope that, somewhere in your paper,you have explained what you mean by "free their minds.". Dickinson suggests that humans have an interconnected relationship with creatures<~~add comma and each individual serves a higher purpose. This challenges the audience to contemplate their position in context of this world. This interpretation of challenging the audience and their expectations of poetry can also be seen in the Anglo-Saxon riddles. By using the first person narrative in "The Whistling Swan" and "The Magpie," the reader is experiencing an unfamiliar world through an animal. The effortless transformation into an animal suggests an underrated relationship between human and creature. One must free the mind of objectivity to truly experience this transformation. By comparing these three pieces, we find that vernacular and literary poetry shares the same intention of challenging our minds to gain perspective on our world.

Very nice.

=)


HELP!!! I don't know what to do and I have a ten lined poem due tommarow and I need to write it now!!!

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