This is a paragraph on my best childhood friend and if you could edit this, I'll be very happy, thanks :-)
My best friend during childhood was Kayla. We met eachother in grade 3 and started hanging out. She was always supportive, and happy. We did everything with eachother. We played together, partnered up, and we had a very close relationship. We were almost like sisters. Differences between me and her was that she was very loud, and I was very quiet. She liked a lot of boys as well, I didn't really, I was pretty shy and stayed away from crowds. We were both very organized and always did our homework. We stood up for eachother as well. I didn't know what a best friend was until I met her.
Also, tell me if I could add more. What else I could talk about?, thanks
My best friend during childhood was Kayla. We met each other in grade 3 and started hanging out. She was always supportive and happy. We did everything with each other. We played together, partnered up, and had a very close relationship. We were almost like sisters. The main difference between her and me was that she was very loud and I was very quiet. She liked a lot of boys as well, while I didn't really like boys then. I was pretty shy and stayed away from crowds. We were both very organized and always did our homework. We stood up for each other as well. I didn't know what a best friend was until I met her.
This looks good, but I've made a few small corrections. Please compare your original with my edited version very carefully, word-for-word and comma-for- comma.
Thank you Ms. Sue :-)
Ms. Sue could I make this paragraph discriptive? We're working on how to write descriptively, and I don't know if this is descriptive
You could describe her physical characteristics -- tall, short, blonde, brunette, etc. How did she show she was loud? Showing off, laughing loudly, etc.?
Use more adjectives.
My best friend during childhood was Kayla. We met each other in grade 3 and started hanging out. We were both the same size, tall and thin. Kayla had long, dark brown hair, that she always kept loose. She was always supportive and happy. We did everything with each other. We played together, partnered up, and had a very close relationship. We were almost like sisters. The main difference between her and me was that she was very loud and I was very quiet. She would usually show off a lot, especially infront of guys she liked. She liked a lot of boys, while I didn't really like boys then. I was pretty shy and stayed away from crowds. We were both very organized and always did our homework. We stood up for each other as well. I didn't know what a best friend was until I met her.
Ms. Sue could you please edit this again, and tell me if this is a good descriptive paragraph, thanks :-)
Very good. Now sprinkle some good adjectives and adverbs around. This thesaurus may help you.
http://thesaurus.reference.com/
My best friend during childhood was Kayla. We met each other in grade 3 and started hanging out. We were both the same size, tall and thin. Kayla had hazel eys, and had long, dark brown hair, which she always kept loose. She was very different from everyone, she was very unique. She wore colourful clothes all the time. She was always supportive, cheerful, gentle and happy. We did everything with each other. We played together, partnered up, and had a very close relationship. We were almost like sisters. The main difference between her and me was that she was very loud and I was very quiet. She had a high-pitched voice. I still have a low pitched-voice. Kayla would usually show off a lot, especially infront of guys she liked. She liked a lot of boys, while I didn't really like boys then. I was pretty shy and stayed away from crowds. Kayla and I were really scared of spiders, we would freak out whenever we would see them. We both loved chocolate icream and strawberry milkshake. We were both very organized and always did our homework. We stood up for each other as well. I didn't know what a best friend was until I met her.
Ms. Sue I don't know what types of adverbs to put in here. Could you please check this to see if I've done it good. I think I've moved from topic to topic. All you help will be appreciated, many, many thanks :-)