Can someone please look over my "I am poem" and give suggestions?
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Je suis une personne sur un voyage
Je me le demande qu'est-ce que le signifier de vie
J'entendre que il y a beaucoup chemin (to choose from)>>>>>(should I also add, "but you only get to pick one" if yes, help translate please)
Je voir le chemin avenir de moi
Je veux arriver le fin
Je comprend que je puissance trébucher le long de chemin
J'essaye (to get up), épousseter moi-même de et coninuer aller
Je m'inquiète je (will not make it)
Je sentir fatigué
Je dits je (will make it)
Je rêve de moi fin endroit
J'espère prendre un long attendre repos
Je suis une personne sur un voyage
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Here's the poem in English:
I am a person on a journey
I wonder what is the meaning of life
I hear that there are many paths to choose from,
I see the path ahead of me
I want to reach the end
I understand that I may trip along the way
I try to get up, dust myself off and keep going
I worry I will not make it
I feel tired
I say I will make it
I dream of my ending place
I hope to take a long awaited rest
I am a person on a journey
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The words and phrases in brackets I need translated. What do you think about the poem and any suggestions to make it better?
Merci Beaucoup!!!
PS. Do you think I should put another 'I am a person on a journy" somewhere in the middle of the poem? If so where would it be appropriate? Merci.
Almost forgot, is there a site that when I enter a phrase in French it will read it out for me? Because I need to know how to pronounce some of these words and phrases.
If not, then that's okay.
Merci!
You need to learn the "je" form of verbs!
Je me le demande qu'est-ce que le signifier de vie = Je me demande la signification de la vie. (Je me demande qu'est-ce qui est la signification de la vie.)
J'entendre que il y a beaucoup chemin (to choose from)>>>>>(should I also add, "but you only get to pick one" if yes, help translate please) = J'entends qu'il y a beaucoup de sentiers don't on peut choisir.
Je voir le chemin avenir de moi = Don't forget to conjugate the verb = Je vois le chemin devant moi.
Je veux arriver le fin = Je veux arriver à la fin. (unless you mean "the purpose" = le but)
Je comprend que je puissance trébucher le long de chemin = Je comprends que je peux trébucher chemin faisant. (en route/en chemin)
J'essaye (to get up), épousseter moi-même de et coninuer aller = J'essaye de me lever, m'épousseter et continuer à aller.
Je m'inquiète je (will not make it) = Je m'inquiète que je ne le fasse pas.
Je sentir fatigué = Je me sens fatigué.
Je dits je (will make it) = Je dis que je le ferai.
Je rêve de moi fin endroit = Je rève à l'endroit où je prends fin. (ending place? = sometimes I'm lost with your English!)
J'espère prendre un long attendre repos = J'espère prendre un long repos.
For example, the line "I am a person on a journey" can be simplified to "I am a person who is travelng?" Did you write this first in English? It's really impossible to translate literally. It doesn't flow as well in French if you do that. It's so late for me tonight that I hope I caught the essence of your poem.
Sra (aka Mme)
To get suggestions for your poem, you can ask someone to review it and offer their feedback. You can also join online writing communities or forums where you can share your work and receive constructive critiques.
Regarding the translation of the phrases in brackets:
- "to choose from" can be translated as "à choisir parmi"
- "but you only get to pick one" can be translated as "mais vous ne pouvez en choisir qu'un seul"
- "to get up" can be translated as "se relever"
In terms of improving the poem, here are a few suggestions:
1. Consider adding punctuation: Punctuation can help clarify the structure and flow of the poem. For example, using commas at the end of each line could reinforce the rhythm and pacing.
2. Explore more vivid imagery: To make your poem more engaging, you can use descriptive language and vivid imagery to capture the reader's attention. Try to paint a detailed picture with your words.
3. Enhance the rhythm and rhyme: Consider experimenting with the poem's rhythm and rhyme scheme to create a more musical flow. You can try incorporating different poetic methods, such as alliteration, assonance, or repetition, to give your poem a unique flair.
Regarding your question about placing another "I am a person on a journey" in the middle of the poem, it is entirely up to you. If it fits the theme and adds depth to your poem, you can certainly consider including it. Experiment with different placements and see what feels most appropriate and impactful to you.
Remember, poetry is a personal and subjective form of expression, so ultimately, the changes you make should reflect your own style and intent.