composition&communication

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I have to make a thesis statement for my essay I have made one but it's not good enough. It has to be 25 words or less and be about flat irons and curling irons including my bias and four points i'll be compare and contrasting them on. My teacher gave me one to use and make my own but it's more than 25 words so I can't use it. Please help?

I have- Although curling irons are great flat irons offer more, they’ll both be analyzed on their style options, tips and results, completion time, and damage affects.

My teacher suggested- Although flat irons and curling irons appear to be very similar, a closer look at style options etc. reveal that the flat iron is actually a more effective hair care product.

  • composition&communication -

    Your teacher's thesis is good, but too wordy.

    Although flat irons and curling irons seem similar, the flat iron is actually the more effective hair care product.

  • composition&communication -

    Thank you for your help but I think I need to have the points I will be arguing about included or at least one of them and they are style options, damage effects, completion time, tips and results.

  • composition&communication -

    Although flat irons and curling irons seem similar, the flat iron produces more style options and less damage to the hair.

  • composition&communication -

    Thank you I actually came up with the same thing, I found a thesis generator online and used it.

  • composition&communication -

    You're welcome.

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