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I posted my essay earlier for punctuation, corrections, and I really need help correcting the following from the essay:

-I read the Quran everyday of my life to learn and get inspired from.

-The book had this amazing story about a Woman that was cured from breast cancer by praying to Imam Al-Mahdi.

-On the forth day in Mecca she wanted to pray near the Ka'ba but it was too crowded.

-After praying the same man asked her if she wants to pray again, but she told him she was to sick to pray again.

-She turned her head and the man disappeared, and the crowed was normal again.

-What makes this worrier my top roll model is that nothing stopped Imam Al-Husain from fighting against tyranny.

-Terrorist in till this day are killing and bombing people in Iraq because they love this worrier and visit his grave each year.

-They taught me to be patience for the sake of truth, and to have faith in god.

  • english -

    1. Eliminate "from." Try not to end sentences with a preposition.

    2. "Woman" should boot be capitalized.

    3. "…Mecca, she… but, it…."

    4. "After praying, the…if she wanted…."

    5. "crowd"?

    6. "warrior"?

    7. "Terrorists until…Iraq, because…this warrior. They visit his grave each year." Visiting the grave is not a reason for killing and bombing, so it needs to be a separate sentence.

    8. "… be patient… truth and…."

  • english -

    In the future, if nobody is available to proofread your work, you can do this yourself. After writing your material, put it aside for a day — at least several hours. (This breaks mental sets you might have that keep you from noticing problems.) Then read it aloud as if you were reading someone else's work. (Reading aloud slows down your reading, so you are less likely to skip over problems.)

    If your reading goes smoothly, that is fine. However, wherever you "stumble" in your reading, other persons are likely to have a problem in reading your material. Those "stumbles" indicate areas that need revising.

    Another option, if it is available on your computer, is to have the computer read it to you.

    Also, make use of "Spelling and Grammar" under "Tools" in your word processing program.

    Once you have made your revisions, repeat the process above. Good papers often require many drafts.

  • english -

    Thank you so much and thanx for the tip I'll try it on my next essay

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