Business Communication

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Your boss wants to send a brief email message welcoming employees recently transferred to your department from your Hong Kong branch. They all speak English, but your boss asks you to review his message for clarity. What would you suggest your boss change in the following email message, and why? Would you consider this message to be audience centered? Why or why not? Revise the email so that it follows effective communication guidelines.

"I wanted to welcome you ASAP to our little family here in the States. It's high time we shook hands in person and not just across the sea. I'm pleased as punch about getting to know you all, and I for one will do my level best to sell you on America."

  • Business Communication -

    Thank you for using the Jiskha Homework Help Forum. Yes, they speak English? But I doubt they would understand the slang:
    ASAP
    high time
    pleased as punch

    His e-mail to them should be more simplistic!

    Sra

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