Have you got your health checked? We have to go the hospital to get your medical certificate. After the 5th period, let's go out. He doesn't seem to have classes after 5th period(class). As I don't have classes as well, we can go out to do several things. I'll write down what to do and the destination in the official trip book. I have to enter the information in Neice, which is a program for the employee in our field. After that let's go to the immigration office to get the alien registration card. Then we should go to the cell phone agency to open your cell phone account. Then we need to go to a store to buy "a 21 inch TV". We have to buy "a 21 inch TV" for about 140,000 won. We can make the TV delivered to your home. Here is a cell phone agencey. Let's go inside and open your cell phone account. You have to pay the bill for a cell phone. What kind of cell phon do you have in mind. Look at the cell phone on display and choose one. The cell phone price is not supported by the Education Baord.
Do you want to buy this one. OK. Good!
-----------------------
OK. Than you. I corrected the passage according to your directions and added more things to the passage. Would you check the expressions?
Have you got your health checked? We have to go the hospital to get your medical certificate. After the<~~delete "the" 5th period, let's go out. He doesn't seem to have classes after 5th period(class)<~~delete "(class)". Since I don't have classes either, we can go out to do several things. I'll write down what to do and the destination in the official trip book. I have to enter the information in Neice, which is a program for the employee in our field. After that let's go to the immigration office to get the alien registration card. Then we should go to the cell phone agency to open your cell phone account. Then we need to go to a store to buy a 21-inch TV. We can buy a 21-inch TV for about 140,000 won, and we can arrange to have the TV delivered to your home. Here is a cell phone agencey. Let's go inside and open your cell phone account. You have to pay the bill for a cell phone. What kind of cell phon<~~sp? do you have in mind. Look at the cell phones on display and choose one. The cell phone price is not supported by the Education Baord.
Do you want to buy this one.<~~needs a question mark OK. Good!
Also -- Board, not Baord.
Do you have an English spell checker on your computer? It would have picked up the two spelling errors.
Sure, I'd be happy to help you check the expressions in your passage. Here are a few corrections and suggestions:
1. "Have you got your health checked?" could be rewritten as "Have you had a health check?" or "Did you get a health check?"
2. Instead of "we have to go the hospital to get your medical certificate," it would be more accurate to say "we need to go to the hospital to obtain your medical certificate."
3. "After the 5th period" is unclear without context. It might be better to mention a specific time, like "after school" or "in the afternoon."
4. Instead of "He doesn't seem to have classes after 5th period," you could say "It seems like he doesn't have any classes after the 5th period."
5. "I'll write down what to do and the destination in the official trip book" could be rewritten as "I will record the tasks and destinations in the official trip book."
6. "Neice" is not clear. Is it a specific program? If so, it might be helpful to explain what it is and its purpose.
7. "Then we should go to the cell phone agency" could be revised as "Next, let's proceed to the cell phone agency."
8. Instead of "We have to buy 'a 21 inch TV'," you can say "We need to purchase a 21-inch TV."
9. "We have to buy 'a 21 inch TV' for about 140,000 won" could be written as "We should buy a 21-inch TV, which costs approximately 140,000 won."
10. "You have to pay the bill for a cell phone" can be rewritten as "You will need to pay the cell phone bill."
11. "What kind of cell phon do you have in mind" should be "What kind of cell phone do you have in mind?"
12. "The cell phone price is not supported by the Education Board" is not clear. It would be better to explain why the Education Board is relevant to the cell phone price.
13. Instead of "Do you want to buy this one. OK. Good!" it would be more natural to say "Are you interested in buying this one? Alright, great!"
Overall, the revised passage would be more clear and concise with these adjustments.