What would be a good title for this essay?
Also, what is wrong about this essay?
Essay: Animals have been used in medical research for centuries. Most of the animals used for research are rodents such as rats, mice, hamsters and gerbils. Some dogs, cats and a variety of goats, ferrets, pigeons, monkeys and rabbits are also used .The struggle against this tyranny is a struggle as important as any of the moral and social issues that have been fought over in recent years. Animal rights are an emotional issue, second only perhaps, to the bitter abortion debate. For decades the value of animal research has been grossly overrated. Although researchers have depended on animal test data to achieve medical advances, there should be other means of research because testing on animals is cruel, inhumane, and often unnecessary. Perhaps it would be more beneficial and humane to test on violent criminals such as s, murderers, and others on death row.
The American Medical Association believes that research involving animals is absolutely essential to maintaining and improving the health human beings. They point out, that virtually every advance in medical science in the 20th century, from antibiotics to organ transplants, has been achieved either directly or indirectly through the use of animals in laboratory experiments. They also emphasize that animal research holds the key for solutions to AIDS, cancer, heart disease, aging and congenital defects. Finally, they insist that the result of these experiments has been the elimination or control of many infectious diseases. This has meant a longer, healthier, better life with much less pain and suffering for humans. For many patients, it has meant life it self.
However, there should be other means of research because the whole process of animal research remains cruel and inhumane. Animal rights activists have gathered a large amount of information that has closed down many laboratories that violate anti-cruelty statutes. In the past, research labs have had to be subsequently suspended due to animal cruelty. Reports involving horrifyingly painful experiments on monkeys and the filthy laboratories the animals must live in. Animals limited to living in tiny metal cages in which they can barely move. From the capture of primates in the wild, to the factory-like breeding of mice and dogs, to the confinement and isolation of cages, it is undeniable that animal research is inherently cruel.
Animal research is often unnecessary. History has shown that many important medical advances have been made by clinical research and close observations of human patients, not animals. There are countries that don't use healthy animals to train veterinarians or teach surgical techniques. In England they use only sick or injured animals and do most of their work on animal cadavers. Humans can give informed consent. Monkeys and dogs cannot. Many AIDS patients have said they are willing to try out new drugs, so why not let them volunteer for testing. In most cases the drugs will need to be tested on humans before the FDA will approve them anyway. It is a known fact that not all drugs work the same on humans as they do on animals.
Many of the ways animals are treated would never be acceptable towards people. We understand that people have certain rights that keep them from being experimented on by other people. What we don't realize is that it is impossible to justify rights for humans, who are a type of animal, and deny rights to non-human animals. Animals have a right to life just as humans have a right to life. Human morality must expand to acknowledge and respect the rights of non-human animals.
Finally, it works. :) I forgot to press the double enter thing. :)
Please see GuruBlue's response below. Then repost if you have more questions.
http://www.jiskha.com/display.cgi?id=1206974244
A potential title for this essay could be "Animal Research: Cruelty, Necessity, and the Ethical Dilemma." This title captures the main ideas discussed in the essay, highlighting the arguments against using animals in medical research, the potential ethical concerns, and the necessity of finding alternative research methods.
In terms of what is wrong with the essay, a few points can be identified:
1. Lack of structure: The essay appears to jump from one point to another without a clear organization. It would be better to start with an introduction that introduces the topic and provides an overview of the main arguments to be discussed, followed by paragraphs that address specific points in a logical order.
2. Lack of citations or evidence: While the essay presents some strong points, it lacks proper supporting evidence or citations to back up these claims. Adding relevant research studies, expert opinions, or statistical data would strengthen the arguments and make them more convincing.
3. Biased language: The essay contains language that leans towards one side of the argument, particularly in the first paragraph where the use of phrases like "tyranny" and "cruel, inhumane, and often unnecessary" demonstrate a clear bias. To maintain objectivity, it is important to use neutral language and provide a balanced view of the topic.
4. Insufficient consideration of opposing views: The essay seems to focus primarily on the negative aspects of animal research while not adequately addressing counterarguments or acknowledging the potential benefits. To strengthen the essay's overall argument, it would be beneficial to consider and rebut opposing viewpoints.
By addressing these areas of improvement, the essay can become more well-structured, supported by evidence, and balanced in its discussion of animal research.