I must improve the organization of these four sentences of a paragraph in the most effective way. Is my answer correct?
Sentences:
1. The reader has probably figured out that the boy named Walter was Walter Elias Disney.
2. During his lifetime Disney and his staff created 18 animated feature-length films and won 48 Academny Awards.
3. With a steadfast determination to reach his goals and a desire to share his appreciation of animals, Walt Disney enriched the lives of millions of people around the world.
4. He also produced television shows, such as Disney's Wonderful World of Color and The Mickey Mouse Club, and founded California's Disneyland.
My answer: I am changing the order of the sentences to: 1, 2, 4, then 3. Is my order correct?
Looks good, especially with your revised order.
Your order is almost correct, but there is a more effective way to organize the sentences.
The most effective order for the sentences in the paragraph is as follows:
Sentence 3: With a steadfast determination to reach his goals and a desire to share his appreciation of animals, Walt Disney enriched the lives of millions of people around the world.
Sentence 1: The reader has probably figured out that the boy named Walter was Walter Elias Disney.
Sentence 4: He also produced television shows, such as Disney's Wonderful World of Color and The Mickey Mouse Club, and founded California's Disneyland.
Sentence 2: During his lifetime, Disney and his staff created 18 animated feature-length films and won 48 Academy Awards.
This order creates a more logical flow in the paragraph. Sentence 3 introduces Walt Disney's characteristics and his impact on people's lives. Sentence 1 provides a small hint about his identity. Sentence 4 expands on his achievements beyond animated films. Finally, Sentence 2 provides specific achievements related to his work in the film industry.
Remember, when improving the organization of sentences in a paragraph, it is important to consider the logical flow and coherence of the information presented.