Hi Teachers,
I wrote a sentence in which i think has a wrong sentence structure. Will you correct me with it, please?
When his daughter told us of what he said we promised that we will all be in part of helping him and making him feel like family.
One thing to get under control is your overuse of prepositions and other words. Here are my corrections for you:
I wrote a sentence which I think has incorrect sentence structure...
When his daughter told us what he said, we promised that we would all help him and make him feel like family.
Can you find the differences? Let me know if you have questions about the changes I made.
Thanks. I forgot the comma ansd i used tha present tense when it is supposed to be the past tense.
I also omitted the unnecessary words. Do you notice what I omitted?
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Of course, I'd be happy to help you correct your sentence. Let's take a look at it:
"When his daughter told us of what he said we promised that we will all be in part of helping him and making him feel like family."
To improve the sentence structure, we can make a few changes:
"When his daughter told us what he had said, we promised that we would all be a part of helping him and making him feel like family."
Here's the breakdown of the changes:
1. Instead of "of what," we can simply say "what."
2. We can use the past perfect tense "had said" to indicate that the father spoke before his daughter told us.
3. Instead of saying "we will all be in part of helping him," we can say "we would all be a part of helping him." This makes the sentence clearer and more concise.
4. We can add the word "a" before "part" to improve the phrasing of the sentence.
5. Finally, we can change "like family" to "feel like family" to convey the intended meaning more effectively.
So, the revised sentence is: "When his daughter told us what he had said, we promised that we would all be a part of helping him and making him feel like family."
I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any further questions.