I urgently need you to check these sentences. Thank you very much.
1) “Pamela” is an epistolary novel, that is a collection of letters written by a virtuous girl, Pamela Andrews, to her parents. The plot is very simple and built around the interrelation between the two main characters, Pamela and Mr B.
2) Fifteen-year-old Pamela Andrews has been the servant girl of Lady B. for many years. When the noblewoman dies, Pamela is sad. She loved Lady B because she had given her an education far beyond her means.
3) Mr B., Lady B’s son, offers to let her remain in the household, and Pamela accepts with gratitude. However, it soon becomes clear that Mr B. intends to seduce her.
4) He then offers to send her home to her parents, but the coachman, who is one of Mr B.’s men, drives her instead to Mr.B’s country house, where she is virtually a prisoner. The girl, however, resists all her master’s advances protecting virtue.
5) She gains from him, as a reward, a proposal of marriage which she accepts, becoming rich and improving her social status.
1. Novels' titles belong in italics, not in quotation marks.
2. Clarify who "she" and "her" are.
3. OK
4. She is "virtually" a prisoner? Or she is really a prisoner? Could she leave?
... protecting her virtue.
5. Awkward and reads funny. Move "as a reward" to the beginning of the sentence so it doesn't interrupt the verb and the direct object.
Is this a good paragraph and do you think it flows well? Thank you very much! "It is my nature to be punctilious and manifest a rectitude of judgment consistent with the teachings of my parents. However, when a person convinces me he will honor his promise and I later realize his promise was fallacious, provokes a bellicose passion."
1) The sentence structure and grammar can be improved in this sentence. Also, it is more accurate to say that "Pamela" is considered an epistolary novel, rather than stating it as a fact. Here's a revised version:
"The novel 'Pamela' is often described as an epistolary novel since it consists of a collection of letters written by a virtuous girl named Pamela Andrews to her parents. The plot revolves around the relationship between the two main characters, Pamela and Mr B."
2) The sentence seems fine, but it can benefit from a small change. Instead of saying "many years," it would be more specific to mention the duration of Pamela's service. Here's an improved version:
"Fifteen-year-old Pamela Andrews has been serving Lady B. as a servant girl for several years. When the noblewoman passes away, Pamela feels a deep sense of sadness. She greatly cherished Lady B because she had provided her with an education that was beyond her means."
3) The sentence accurately describes the situation, but it can be rephrased to make it sound more coherent and less repetitive. Here's a revised version:
"After Lady B's death, her son Mr B., makes an offer to let Pamela stay in the household, which she gratefully accepts. However, it becomes increasingly clear that Mr B. has ulterior motives as he attempts to seduce her."
4) The sentence is structurally correct but can benefit from clearer language. It is important to clarify that Pamela is being taken to Mr. B's country house against her will. Here's an improved version:
"Instead of fulfilling his promise to send her home, Mr. B's coachman, who is one of his men, forcefully takes Pamela to Mr. B's country house where she is essentially held captive. Despite being in a vulnerable position, Pamela bravely resists all of her master's advances to protect her virtue."
5) The sentence is accurate but can be modified to make the cause and effect relationship more apparent. Here's a revised version:
"As a reward for her unwavering resistance and loyalty, Pamela eventually earns a proposal of marriage from Mr. B, which she accepts. This leads to her attaining wealth and an elevated social status."