How can I improve my thesis for a comparative essay:
Although both ¡°All is Calm¡± and ¡°The Bicycle¡± portray love and problems between family members, the protagonists in the stories experience drastically different journeys and each learned their own lessons.
I don't especially don't like the part where it says "each learned their own lessons". I don't know how else to put it. I meant like the protagonists each learned different lesson.
Thank you
I don't think it's a thesis statement yet. It's all factual; there's no opinion/position.
Your thesis statement must include factual information (which you already have) plus your position/opinion/stance. Without your position on the topic, it isn't a true thesis statement. So think of this sentence as the angle you want to take on the topic and what you intend to prove by the end of your paper. (If your statement is simply factual, then there's nothing to prove!)
http://blog.eduify.com/index.php/2009/06/21/5-tips-on-how-to-write-a-strong-thesis-statement/
Read carefully and follow ALL directions.
http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/thesistatement.html
This is one of the very best places I've seen online to help students write good thesis statements. It shows you sentences that aren't thesis statements and how to turn each one into real thesis statements.
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To improve your thesis statement for a comparative essay, you can revise the part where you mention that "each learned their own lessons" to clarify that the protagonists in the stories learned different lessons. Here's a revised version of your thesis statement:
"Although both 'All is Calm' and 'The Bicycle' depict love and family problems, the protagonists in the stories undertake distinct journeys and acquire individual insights or lessons."
In this revision, I replaced "drastically different" with "distinct" to convey the variation in the protagonists' experiences, and worded the phrase about learning lessons to emphasize personal growth and insights. By specifying that the protagonists acquire "individual insights or lessons," it is clear that they learned different things.