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Is this a good thesis sentence?


Music is more than just entertainment; it has physical and psychological effects on humans and animals and is the totality of ideas, perspectives, attitudes, images and other phenomena that are deemed preferred per an informal consensus within the mainstream of a given culture.

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  1. It's much too long.

    Your thesis sentence could stop after "entertainment."

    These sites will help you devise your thesis statement.

    http://www.unc.edu/depts/wcweb/handouts/thesis.html

    http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/545/01/

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