In my previous post I included the following sentence checked by Bob. I can't understand the correction.
1) They have no boots, so their feet bleed (correction: bled? Why is the past needed?).
I did other corrections myself. Can you check them, please?
1)The Picture of Dorian Gray told about a painter, Basil, who, fascinated by the beauty of the young Dorian, decided to portray him. When the portrait was ended, Dorian, who was influenced by the words of Lord Henry, wished the portrait grew old in his place.
2)Correction: The Picture of Dorian Gray is about (or tells the story of) a painter, Basil, who, fascinated by the beauty of the young Dorian, decides to portray him. When the portrait is finished, Dorian, influenced by the words of Lord Henry, wished the portrait grew old in his place.
3)In his panegyric on beauty, Lord Henry said that beauty is a form of genius, that is higher than genius itself because beauty needs no explanation.
4)Correction: Lord Henry defines beauty as a form of genius, which is higher than genius itself because it needs no explanation.
5)The novel is linked to the myth of Faust, who gave his soul to the devil in order to obtain knowledge.
6)Like Dorian, Faust sells his soul to the devil in order to obtain absolute knowledge.
7)After that Dorian’s desire was realized, Dorian could live a life of sins and pleasures.
8)Correction: After Dorian’s desire for eternal youth is satisfied, Dorian leads a sinful life giving in to any kind of pleasure.
8)When he saw the picture old and ugly, that showing his bad conscience, Dorian stabs the picture with the same stab that he had used to kill Basil.
8)When he sees the picture becoming old and ugly (recording the signs of time) Dorian stabs the picture with the same dagger he used to kill Basil.
9)The narrator never intervenes or refers directly to the reader (is the position of directly correct?)
1) They have no boots, so their feet bleed (correction: bled? Why is the past needed?). It should be "bleed" (present) since you're writing about a piece of literature.
I did other corrections myself. Can you check them, please?
2) Correction: The Picture of Dorian Gray tells the story of a painter, Basil, who, fascinated by the beauty of the young Dorian, decides to portray him. When the portrait is finished, Dorian, influenced by the words of Lord Henry, wishes the portrait would grow old in his place.
See the corrections? Are you clear on each one?
4) Correction: Lord Henry defines beauty as a form of genius, which is higher than genius itself because it needs no explanation. OK
5) The novel is linked to the myth of Faust, who gave his soul to the devil in order to obtain knowledge. verb tense?
6) Like Dorian, Faust sells his soul to the devil in order to obtain absolute knowledge. OK
8)Correction: After Dorian’s desire for eternal youth is satisfied, Dorian leads a sinful life giving in to all kinds of pleasure.
8)When he sees the picture becoming old and ugly, recording the signs of time, Dorian stabs the picture with the same dagger he used to kill Basil. OK
9)The narrator never intervenes or refers directly to the reader. OK (is the position of directly correct? yes)
To check your corrections, let's go through each sentence:
1) The correction "bled" is used because the verb "bleed" needs to be in the past tense to match the verb tense of "have." In the original sentence, "their feet bleed" is in present tense, which doesn't match the rest of the sentence. The corrected sentence, "They have no boots, so their feet bled," maintains a consistent past tense.
2) Your correction "The Picture of Dorian Gray is about (or tells the story of) a painter, Basil, who, fascinated by the beauty of the young Dorian, decides to portray him. When the portrait is finished, Dorian, influenced by the words of Lord Henry, wishes the portrait grew old in his place," is accurate. It correctly uses present tense to maintain consistency throughout the sentence.
3) Your correction "Lord Henry defines beauty as a form of genius, which is higher than genius itself because it needs no explanation," simplifies the original sentence while maintaining its meaning. It's well-done.
4) Your sentence "Like Dorian, Faust sells his soul to the devil in order to obtain absolute knowledge" is a valid reformulation of the original sentence. It accurately conveys the intended meaning.
5) Your revised sentence "After Dorian’s desire for eternal youth is satisfied, Dorian leads a sinful life, giving in to any kind of pleasure" captures the intent of the original sentence. However, you may want to consider using a comma after "life" for clarity.
6) Your correction "When he sees the picture becoming old and ugly (recording the signs of time), Dorian stabs the picture with the same dagger he used to kill Basil" improves the original sentence by adding clarity and maintaining consistency in verb tense.
7) Your correction "The narrator never intervenes or directly refers to the reader" simplifies the original sentence while retaining its meaning. Well done.
Overall, your corrections make the sentences clearer and improve their flow. Keep up the good work!