I'm not sure if this paragraph is right. In the last sentence you have to say how the non-fiction text displays the concept of intolerance.

Also, if there is a problem in how the quote/example I used just let me know + if there's a better way of writing the last sentence.

Short sentences are used consistently in the non-fiction text of Night to emphasise on certain words or sentences. Consequently this makes the scene draw suspense at times, gaining attention from the audience. “Softly, he read some ten numbers. We understood. These were the numbers from the selection. Dr Mengele had not forgotten.” In special reference to this quote, it explains the fear and torment the Jews had to undergo in terms of the cruel selection (a process to eliminate ‘weak’ or unfit Jews) made by the German soldiers and how this gradually accumulated to genocide.

Note: this is a body paragraph.

Compare yours above and mine below very carefully to catch all the changes/suggestions I make.

Short sentences are used consistently in the non-fiction text of Night to emphasise certain words or sentences. Consequently this makes the scene draw suspense at times, gaining attention from the audience. “Softly, he read some ten numbers. We understood. These were the numbers from the selection. Dr Mengele had not forgotten.” Here, the author explains the fear and torment the Jews endured during the cruel selection process conducted by the German soldiers. This is the process that gradually culminated in genocide.

To assess if the paragraph is accurate and effective in explaining how the non-fiction text displays the concept of intolerance, we need to analyze its structure and arguments.

The paragraph begins by stating that short sentences in the non-fiction text of Night are used to emphasize certain words or sentences. It then mentions that this consistent use of short sentences creates suspense and grabs the audience's attention. So far, these points connect the style of the text to its impact on the reader.

The paragraph then provides a quote/example:

"Softly, he read some ten numbers. We understood. These were the numbers from the selection. Dr. Mengele had not forgotten."

The quote describes a moment where numbers are being read, and the speaker (presumably a survivor of the Holocaust) understands that they are the numbers of those who were selected to be eliminated. This quote supports the idea that the non-fiction text of Night portrays the fear and torment endured by the Jews due to the cruel selection process conducted by German soldiers, which ultimately led to genocide.

To improve the paragraph and explicitly address how the non-fiction text displays the concept of intolerance, you can revise the last sentence. Here's an example of a revised paragraph:

In the non-fiction text, Night, the consistent use of short sentences serves to emphasize particular words or sentences, generating a sense of suspense and capturing the reader's attention. The quote, "Softly, he read some ten numbers. We understood. These were the numbers from the selection. Dr. Mengele had not forgotten," vividly illustrates the fear and torment experienced by Jews during the Holocaust. The selection process, employed by German soldiers to eliminate 'weak' or unfit Jews, showcases the intolerance and inhumanity that gradually escalated into genocide.

By refining the paragraph with a more explicit discussion of how the non-fiction text displays intolerance, you highlight the connection between the style of the text, the specific example used, and the broader concept being explored.