Business Communications

Your boss wants to send a brief email message welcoming employees recently transferred to your department from your Hong Kong branch. They all speak English, but your boss asks you to review his message for clarity. What would you suggest your boss change in the following email message, and why? Would you consider this message to be audience centered? Why or why not? Revise the email so that it follows effective communication guidelines.

"I wanted to welcome you ASAP to our little family here in the States. It's high time we shook hands in person and not just across the sea. I'm pleased as punch about getting to know you all, and I for one will do my level best to sell you on America."

After researching cultural differences between the United States and Hong Kong, what advice would you give your boss?

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  1. Please repost when you have completed the assignment, even in rough draft. Then someone here will be able to help you with it.

    =)

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    Writeacher
  2. Not knowing their level of English, it would be the best to avoid acronyms (ASAP) and colloquialisms (pleased as punch, sell you and others). Also I believe they would be much more formal than this communication is. In fact, in almost any relationship, it is better to be more formal until you get to know each other better.

    However, since this is not my area of expertise, I searched Google under the key words "'cultural differences' 'Hong Kong' 'United States' business" to get these possible sources:

    http://www.amazon.com/Origins-Cultural-Differences-Impact-Management/dp/1567204392
    http://www.cyborlink.com/besite/

    In the future, you can find the information you desire more quickly, if you use appropriate key words to do your own search.

    I hope this helps. Thanks for asking.

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  3. What are the differences between an internal proposal and an external proposal?

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  4. Reword sentence using active or passive voice.
    A new office recycling program was set up by my supervisor.

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