I'm writing an argument paper on school uniforms. I have wrote a thesis statement and need to have it checked. Any tips to improve would be helpful. Thanks!

School uniforms should be required in all public schools because not only do they cut down on the testing and bullying but they also help students have a better focus on school, and save parents money on clothes.

I think you mean, "I have written ..." -- correct?

The ideas are fine and your opinion is clear. One thing would be to make it more concise. It's very wordy.

http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/concise.htm

How can you make your sentence tighter?

Thank you!

You're welcome.

Your thesis statement is a good start, but it could benefit from some improvement. Here are a few tips to help you revise and enhance your thesis statement on the topic of school uniforms:

1. Make it more specific: While your current thesis addresses some benefits of school uniforms, it could provide more focused and specific points to support your argument. Consider brainstorming a few more specific advantages or aspects related to school uniforms to strengthen your thesis.

2. Add a clear claim or stance: Your thesis should clearly state your position on the topic. By including a clear claim, you let the reader know your main argument and what position you are taking. This will help guide your paper and make your arguments more cohesive.

3. Consider counterarguments: Acknowledging and addressing counterarguments in your thesis can strengthen your argument by demonstrating that you have considered different perspectives. Incorporate a counterargument and briefly mention how you will address it in your paper.

Here's a possible revised thesis statement incorporating these tips:

"Public schools should require school uniforms as they not only alleviate the issue of bullying and distractions but also provide cost savings for parents. Despite concerns about limiting individuality and expression, implementing a uniform policy can foster a safer, more focused learning environment, improve social equality, and positively impact students' academic performance."

Remember, your thesis statement sets the tone for your entire argumentative paper, so it's essential to make it clear, concise, and well-supported. Good luck with your argument paper!