Can you please see what I wrote is in formal language and the grammar is correct.Thank you.
In Ellen's relationships all she wants to do get ahead. Ellen fails so miserably with love because the world moves so quickly that she does not have time to stop and think about what is going on. She keeps her mask on completely because she gives up life with Jimmy so she could be with George and become rich. The modern world lacked compassion and consumed Ellen into that person who did not show any emotion. There was no reason for Ellen to be happy because she she drowned in all of her problems.
You have several idiomatic phrases that should be formalized --
"get ahead"
"what is going on"
"drowned in all of her problems"
Also -- you changed tenses. You should stick with one tense. In fact you changed tenses in the middle of one sentence.
Proofread your last sentence.
In Ellen's relationships all she wants to do get ahead.----->In Ellen's relationships all she wants to do *is* get ahead.
She keeps her mask on completely because she gives up life with Jimmy so she could be with George and become rich. ----> She keeps her mask on completely because she gives up life with Jimmy. She does this so she can be with George and become rich.
The modern world lacked compassion and consumed Ellen into that person who did not show any emotion.---->At the time, the modern world lacked compassion and consumed Ellen into a person who did not show any emotion.
There was no reason for Ellen to be happy because she she drowned in all of her problems. ----->
Ellen drowned in all of her problems, so there was no reason for her to be happy.
What do you mean by the phrases being formulated. How do I change the tense or where does it need to be changed at
The phrases should be formalized, that is you should use more formal language than idiomatic expressions. What exactly do you mean that Ellen wants to "get ahead?" Make money? Graduate? Get a promotion? The term's meaning in this context is unclear.
For consistency of verb tense, please study these sites.
(Broken Link Removed)
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/601/08/
In terms of formality, your writing is mostly in formal language. However, there are a few areas where you could further enhance the formality and clarity of your sentences.
Here's a revised version with improved grammar and enhanced formality:
In Ellen's relationships, her primary focus is to advance herself. Ellen's struggles with love stem from the rapid pace of the world, leaving her little time for self-reflection. She remains guarded by wearing a metaphorical mask, sacrificing her relationship with Jimmy in pursuit of wealth alongside George. The modern world lacks compassion, leading Ellen to become emotionally detached. Plagued by numerous problems, she finds little reason to be happy, drowning in her own despair.
To ensure your writing is in formal language and grammatically correct, it is helpful to follow these steps:
1. Use formal vocabulary: Opt for more sophisticated and precise words. Avoid slang or informal expressions.
2. Maintain proper grammar: Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and sentence structure.
3. Apply correct punctuation: Use appropriate punctuation marks, such as commas, periods, and apostrophes, to indicate pauses and accurately separate sentence elements.
4. Check for sentence clarity: Ensure that your sentences convey your intended meaning clearly and concisely.
5. Proofread: Always reread your writing to catch any errors or inconsistencies and make necessary revisions.
By following these steps, you can enhance the formality and grammatical accuracy of your writing.