From what was commented on my report on tooth bleaching hazards, I was curious to know what exactly everyone thought about it. I really thought from the comments I read besides those from drwls, that ideas were inconclusive as to whether it was a good report or not. As I've worked very hard (a week to be exact) on the report, I would like to be enlightened as to if it was good or not. In addition please explain why you think this about the report because I'll definately ask. ;D
(I know that there are gramatical errors so I'm not refering to those kind of flaws [I seriously don't know how to distinguish where to place a comma from a colon])
This post is specifically directed toward both Ms.Sue & Dr.Bob but if anybody else would like to comment on my essay you are most welcome to.
(my essay is under a post of a identical title below)
(Ms.Sue has already said what she thinks and I know you don't look on the 2nd page so I'm posting again)
Thanks alot =D
You posted this identical post yesterday morning and have received responses.
Please do not double-post.
Thanks.
I KNOW THAT...Writeteacher
IF you read the post title and look at who posted on the last post you will know why I put this AGAIN
Christina -- you've put us in a difficult position. You ask if your report is "good." We have no way of knowing whether you're a middle school student or a college student. We don't know whether your intended audience is a college science professor, a general audience, or a high school English teacher. Count Iblis and DrWLS gave you some excellent feedback from a educational point of view. I commented from a general audience point of view.
I'm sure Dr.Bob has seen both of your latest posts and may have chosen not to respond.
Christina--
I was the first to respond by saying I could tell you had put in a lot of work. I assumed the article was for general information and not to try to convince anyone that they should or should not use the product. As a general article, I agree with Ms. Sue and Writeacher that the exact citations are not needed. The only constructive criticism I can offer is that it was a little difficult for me, as I read it, to distinguish between what you were reporting from what you read and what you were concluding on your own. However, it was much better written and much better researched than many of the papers I have graded through the years. Again, thanks for sharing.
Hm...well I'll just say this again, the Only reason I didn't do what I admit would be "proper" citations is that I wasn't handing it in for a grade. If I was I would have gone and done proper citations and all and even elaborated some more on the studies and would have done even more reasearch. The thing is that I HAVE been criticized by my previous english teacher on using too many citations on my final report. It by the way it was on "Is it ethical to keep animals for our own entertainment" and basically it is impossible to keep stating my personal opinion when you have no real physical proof of abuse to them so I did alot of citations to prove my case. To make a long story short my grade for the class was the lowest I had ever received in english even though others would have been happy with it.
So in your opinion I blended it too well with my own opinion.( I have to figure out a way to stop that)
Just because someone puts alot of work into something doesn't necessarily mean that it was a good report. A report in my opinion is NEVER perfect as are people.
P.S the whole reason I asked for your opinion specifically was that this whole report started with you saying that you were interested in seeing what I found. That led to the literally 3 pg with double space paper. I really wouldn't be able to use it anywhere else either.
Once again Thanks for your opinion Dr.Bob =)
does it really even causeeeeeeeeeee problems? if under adult supervision, it should be fine.
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Based on the comments you received on your tooth bleaching hazards report, it seems that the opinions are inconclusive as to whether it was a good report or not. Different people gave their feedback from different perspectives, such as an educational point of view, a general audience point of view, and considering factors like the intended audience and purpose of your report.
Ms. Sue and Writeacher mentioned that the citations in your report might not be necessary for a general article, while DrWLS provided feedback from an educational standpoint. Writeacher also mentioned that it was a little difficult for them to distinguish between the information you reported and your own conclusions. Despite that, they acknowledged that your report was well-written and well-researched compared to other papers they have graded.
In your response, you mentioned that you did not include proper citations because you weren't submitting it for a grade. You explained that in a previous report where you used many citations, you received criticism from your English teacher. You also mentioned that you may have blended your own opinion too much with the information in the report. It's important to find a balance between presenting information and expressing your own thoughts and analysis.
Overall, since we don't have the full context of your report or your specific goals for it, it is difficult to definitively say whether it was good or not. However, the feedback you received suggests that your report had strong points and areas for improvement. It's always helpful to consider the intended audience, purpose, and proper citation guidelines when writing a report.
If you want further clarification on why they have certain opinions about your report, you can directly ask the individuals who provided feedback. They might be able to provide more specific insights based on their comments.