grammar

does this sentence make sense? how can I make it better?
A man determined to find love through the internet finds out that love is staring him in the face the whole time.Thanks

How about this?

Determined to find love through the Internet, a man finds that love is staring him in the face the whole time.

??

The point is to keep the subject (man) and the main verb (finds) as close together as possible.

=)

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asked by erin

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