Does this sound argumentative enough and is worded correctly.
( I know that this isn't true but in my case for this paper this is what we have to do)
Fighting war for freedom is more efficient than having global peace and freedom.
OR
fighting war for freedom is more effiecent than achieving global peace and freedom.
You need to get rid of the wording "global peace" -- it's a completely unrealistic idea. Just delete "global" and the rest will be OK.
The second sentence is better -- without "global."
the problem is both statements here are the opposite of the truth.
It is much more efficient to not crash a car than to crash it (go to war) and go through the time and expense of repairing it.
The argument you have presented can be seen as controversial and debatable, as it states that fighting war for freedom is more efficient than achieving global peace and freedom. However, it is important to note that the wording and structure of an argument can greatly affect its effectiveness.
In terms of wording, the statement seems clear and direct. However, there are a few slight adjustments that can be made to enhance its argumentative quality. First, consider including a clear thesis statement at the beginning to clearly state your viewpoint. For example:
"In this paper, I will argue that fighting war for freedom is more efficient than achieving global peace and freedom."
This revised statement explicitly states your stance and gives readers a clear understanding of what to expect in your paper.
Additionally, the term "efficient" may benefit from further elaboration. Are you referring to the speed at which freedom can be attained or the overall effectiveness of the means employed? Clarifying this can provide a stronger foundation for your argument.
Overall, while the statement seems to be positioned as an argument, it ultimately needs to be supported by strong evidence, logical reasoning, and counterarguments to be fully persuasive.