Can someone please over look my work and check for errors, I read over it and found nothing wrong, but I am sure there are things I am missing. Thank you
I believe that the question “Can we control our fate?” is difficult to answer when most of us do not know what our fate may be. But, putting that aside, my answer to the question is we as humans may be able to direct ourselves into a path leading to our fate, but not directly being the reason we ultimately end up with a certain fate. We can direct ourselves into our future due to the actions we make throughout our lives. And even though some decisions may seem minor at the time it can play an important part in one’s fate. Leading onto the concept of making decisions is the question “How much control do people really have over their own lives?” Although some things are bound to happen like natural disasters and other people's actions, in our everyday lives we are constantly making choices that affect our lives. This shows that we have an extreme amount of control in our own lives. However, different situations may have different restrictions on how much one can control their life. The summed up definition of destiny is events that are certain to happen in one's future, which will be the person's reason for living. I do believe it exists or at least in a way it does or what is the point of living? Everything that humans make has a reason for function so why wouldn’t God make us with a reason. Even though some people’s destiny may not be as great or impactful as others, the destiny every human should be to strive for the fulfillment of life.
suggestions:The
I believe that the question “Can we control our fate?” is difficult to answer BECAUSE most of us do not know what our fate may be. But, putting that aside, my answer to the question is we as humans may be able to direct ourselves into a path leading to our fate, but THAT MAY NOT BE the reason we ultimately end up with a certain fate. We can direct ourselves into our future BY the actions we TAKE throughout our lives. And .... though some decisions may seem minor at the time THEY can play an important part in one’s fate. Leading onto the concept of making decisions is the question “How much control do people really have over their own lives?” Although some things are bound to happen like natural disasters and other people's actions, in our everyday lives we are constantly making choices that affect our lives. This shows that we have an extreme amount of control OVER OUR own lives. However, different situations may RESTRICT how much one can control their life. ONES' DESTINY is DETERMINED BY events that are certain to happen in one's future, which will be the person's reason for living. I do believe it exists or at least in a way it does or what is the point of living? Everything that humans make has a reason for function so why wouldn’t God make us with a reason. Even though some people’s destiny may not be as great or impactful as others, the destiny every human should be to strive for IS the fulfillment of life.
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"into our future due to the actions we make throughout"
Better is this: into our future because of the actions we take throughout
These two seem to be contradictory:
"most of us do not know what our fate may be"
and
"may be able to direct ourselves into a path leading to our fate, but not directly being the reason we ultimately end up with a certain fate."
decisions … it <~~? a singular referring to a plural?
"Leading onto the concept of making decisions is the question"
~ "onto" needs to be to
~ need punctuation after "question"
Start a new paragraph with "Although"
These sentences are contradictory:
"This shows that we have an extreme amount of control in our own lives. However, different situations may have different restrictions on how much one can control their life."
Awkward phrasing:
"The summed up definition of destiny is events … "
What is "it" here?
"I do believe it exists or at least in a way it does or what is the point of living?"
Plural people have one destiny??
"some people’s destiny"
Thank you both so much I will use both of your suggestions as I rewrite and fix the errors!
You're welcome!
Sure, I'd be happy to help! I'll review your work and point out any errors or areas for improvement.
Overall, your writing seems clear and coherent. However, I did notice a few minor issues that you could revise. Here are my suggestions:
1. In the second sentence, you wrote "But, putting that aside, my answer to the question is..." Instead of "But," consider using a phrase like "Setting that aside," or "Despite that," to make the transition smoother.
2. In the sentence "We can direct ourselves into our future due to the actions we make throughout our lives," the phrase "due to the actions we make" can be simplified to "through our actions" for clarity and conciseness.
3. The sentence "And even though some decisions may seem minor at the time it can play an important part in one’s fate" can be improved by adding a comma after "time." It should read: "And even though some decisions may seem minor at the time, they can play an important part in one’s fate."
4. In the sentence "However, different situations may have different restrictions on how much one can control their life," consider rephrasing to "However, different situations may impose varying restrictions on one's ability to control their life."
5. In the sentence "The summed up definition of destiny is events that are certain to happen in one's future, which will be the person's reason for living," it might be clearer to say "The basic definition of destiny is a series of events that are believed to be predetermined and will shape one's future, giving purpose to an individual's life."
6. In the last sentence, it can be revised to say "Even though some people's destinies may not be as great or impactful as others, every human should strive for the fulfillment of life."
I hope these suggestions help! Remember, it's always a good idea to have someone else review your work to catch any errors or areas that could be improved. Keep up the good work!