Please Help Re-Word!!!
I have close family members who are part of the LGBTQ community, and as a reader I ------------- that this bill would pertain to “individuals not in the LGBTQ community may not understand the political forces that impact people in the LGBTQ community, and therefore may not advocate for them because it does not directly impact them
Who is your intended audience?
I don't understand what you're trying to say.
I am not but I have family members who are part of the LGBT community they as well as others will benefit from this proposal I am writing to congress.
Because individuals not in the LGBTQ community may not understand the political forces that impact people in the LGBTQ community, and therefore may not advocate for them because it does not directly impact them
Sara/Tierra ~
Be sure to recognize and fix the run-on in the first part. That’s a major error in English composition.
From the quotation marks you started to use in the first post here, it seems you are quoting from somewhere. Be sure to use quotation marks correctly for ALL quoted passages, as well as giving correct and complete citation, so you don’t commit plagiarism.
I am not but I have family members who are part of the LGBT community they as well as others will benefit from this proposal I am writing to Congress.
Because people not in the LGBTQ community may not understand the political forces that hit/effect people in the LGBTQ community, and therefore may not fight for them because it does not directly hit/effect them.
You have not corrected the first error. A run-on is similar to a comma splice, but doesn’t even have the comma!
http://www.chompchomp.com/terms/commasplice.htm