My teacher has gave us an assignment to write a story on the Great Depression from the eyes of someone from the Great Depression. It has to be in a fourth grade readability level. Can you please lok over this essay and see if it is appropriate?
Essay:
I spent one of those long summer days in August of 1936. The drive in the sweltering afternoon made sitting in the car almost like sitting in hell’s waiting room. Being in such a state for several hours led me to search for refuge in some decent shanty rather than the faithful black car that I owned since the elections of 1928, preferring to sleep in comfort rather than the dreadful captivity. For the most part, I spend these days, crossing the borders of each state, waving to the people that are no longer my own, examining the landscape, and recalling times that have long passed. Sometimes I would see a batch of faithful citizens, waving timidly at a distance among crowds of bitter people who now chase after my car, shouting for my payment for the effects of the Depression.
The Depression caused everything to flop, including the once bustling lives of the people. As far as I could see, the land of America was broken and now populated by disheartened people. However, the responsibility for its reparations no longer lay in my hands but those of Roosevelt’s.
I momentarily left my car to inspect the barren landscape of Kansas for a moment, as if I still had the right to preside over it. There are many things I would like to go back and change but I no longer have the ability to do so. Just twenty steps away, I make eye contact with one of the laborers; who still search for useful material that lay in this land of nothing. He glanced at me for a moment and then continued his work silently. He didn’t seem to recognize me.
I stop him. “Do you know where can I find water?”
He laughs loudly. “Hey, would you rather ask for gold? There is no water here. We’ve been under a drought for years.”
“No!...” I respond, in shock.
“Yes. And you know damn right well, I mean it. Look around you. Can you see any water?” He chuckles once more and turns away.
Far ahead, I sight a tractor buried under a mound of dust. I tap his shoulder again.
“What is it now?”
“My apologies. But what is that?”
“A tractor under a whole lot of dust.”
“But how....?” I was getting impatient now.
“From that dust storm... I ‘wager it’s called the Dust Bowl. You didn’t know?”
The Dust Bowl already occurred two years ago, in 1934. No wait – was it possible, it might have occurred again?
Trudging forward, my feet dig deeper and deeper into the sand, I head towards the now destroyed tractor. On the side of my foot, I feel something soft. Is it a child? No, a baby? Are there more? Finally I see something. A body of a woman. She is wrapped in a shawl, her face is covered. I think she was shielding something. Horrified, I shake her repeatedly, trying to wake her up. Her scarf comes off and I meet the sunken eyes of two corpses, mother and child.
The dunes of sand no longer shackle my legs as I wander listlessly. I came upon the realization that I was surrounded by the graves of hundreds of people who had to faced the consequences of crude agriculture. And t wasn’t their fault. They had lived privileged lives and knew nothing of farming since the industry of the 1920s relied more on automobiles and banking. They knew nothing and suddenly had nothing. Their lives were taken away by the Depression, and they were placed to readapt and survive the best way possible in places like these. It was as if God ruthlessly placed them there to discover that their lack of knowledge measured up to lack of poor practical life skills. I knew the fault was mine. Dear God, if such mistakes were not made during my time of presidency, would such an ill-fate be prevented?
-Herbert Hoover
The essay you have provided contains some excellent descriptions and details about the Great Depression. However, there are a few aspects that may need to be modified to align with a fourth-grade readability level.
First, let's take a look at sentence structure and complexity. In some places, the sentences are quite long and have complex vocabulary. To make the essay more accessible for a fourth-grade audience, try breaking down longer sentences into shorter ones and simplifying the vocabulary. For example, instead of saying "preferring to sleep in comfort rather than the dreadful captivity," you could say "choosing to sleep in a comfortable place instead of the cramped car."
Additionally, the essay could benefit from a more straightforward and concise narrative style. This will help young readers understand the story better. You could try using simpler words and phrases to convey the same message. For instance, instead of saying "The Depression caused everything to flop, including the once bustling lives of the people," you could say "The Depression made everything go wrong, even the lives of the people who used to be busy and happy."
Lastly, it would be helpful to provide more context about the Great Depression itself. A fourth-grade reader may not have a comprehensive understanding of the time period. You can briefly explain what the Great Depression was and why it had such a significant impact on people's lives. This will make the story more relatable and informative for younger readers.
By making these adjustments, you can ensure that the essay is appropriate for a fourth-grade readability level and effectively conveys the perspective of someone living through the Great Depression.