The store will stay open later during the holiday season. The store will stock a variety of seasonal merchandise.

Question

The store will stay open later during the holiday season. The store will stock a variety of seasonal merchandise.

The store will have many discounts available for holiday shoppers.

22. When revising the paragraph above, the writer should address which of the following?

A. Sentence fluency

B. Punctuation

C. Paragraph organization

D. Writing clarity

I think its A because the sentences are not really flowing from one to another. Is this correct?

Answer 1

Yes, fluency.

Fluency is constantly interrupted by the repetition of "the store" -- plus, each sentence seems to be a separate topic of its own.

Answer 2

Yes, you are correct. Sentence fluency refers to the smooth and coherent flow of sentences within a paragraph or piece of writing. When revising the paragraph, the writer should address how the sentences are structured and connected to ensure that the ideas flow logically and smoothly. In the given paragraph, there are separate statements about the store staying open later, stocking seasonal merchandise, and offering discounts, but they are not connected in a cohesive manner. Therefore, addressing sentence fluency would be the appropriate choice for revision in this case.