10. Which of the following sentences should not be used in "I" messages? (Choose 2)
A) You make me feel humiliated when you criticize me.
B)It's hard for me to think clearly when you are singing.
C)I would like us to leave on time in the future.
D)I do not like it when you borrow my things without asking.
One way to be clear and direct is to use "I" messages, which state your needs and feelings. They do not focus on the traits and behaviors of someone else. "I" messages do not blame or judge someone's behavior. They simply state how you feel about a behavior and what you want done about it. Using "I" messages allows you to take responsibility for your feelings.
The three parts of an "I" message are: "I feel _______ when you _______ because _______," followed by a clear request.
1. A and B
2. What do you think should be in those blanks?
To determine which of the sentences should not be used in "I" messages, let's review the guidelines for constructing "I" messages:
1. "I" messages state your needs and feelings.
2. They do not focus on the traits and behaviors of someone else.
3. "I" messages do not blame or judge someone's behavior.
4. They simply state how you feel about a behavior and what you want done about it.
5. "I" messages allow you to take responsibility for your feelings.
Let's analyze each sentence:
A) You make me feel humiliated when you criticize me.
This sentence does not follow the guidelines for "I" messages because it focuses on the behavior and traits of the other person, blaming them for making the speaker feel humiliated. It does not take responsibility for the speaker's feelings.
B) It's hard for me to think clearly when you are singing.
This sentence does not follow the guidelines for "I" messages because it also focuses on the behavior of the other person, stating that their singing makes it hard for the speaker to think clearly. It does not take responsibility for the speaker's difficulty in thinking clearly.
C) I would like us to leave on time in the future.
This sentence follows the guidelines for "I" messages. It states the speaker's preference and includes a clear request for leaving on time in the future.
D) I do not like it when you borrow my things without asking.
This sentence follows the guidelines for "I" messages. It states the speaker's dislike of the other person borrowing their things without asking.
Based on the analysis, sentences A and B should not be used in "I" messages since they do not adhere to the guidelines.