ENG

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I'm trying to write a paragraph with levels of generality for English. Here's what I have so far... I need help with grammar and punctuation... also does it make sense ?


In the city of Carson, California there is a small house on Mesa Boulevard that is shared among five people, each with diverse interests.
Junior’s room contains surround sound speakers where he listens to music all the time and a book titled “Atheism: The Case Against God” rests on his headboard.
Hector’s room, the biggest of all, has huge Buddhist God statues that are decorated with beads and flowers. In Jose and Carla’s room the King sized bed takes up most of the space; a crucifix hangs on the wall next to a picture of the Virgin Mary.
My room is neither the biggest nor the smallest; it’s perfect. It has decorated lavender drapes, old vintage records hung on the walls, and a King James Version Bible that I read daily can always be found on my bed. We all believe in something. Despite our different styles we are all a family who care and love each other regardless of our religious beliefs.

  • English -

    In the city of Carson, California, there is a small house on Mesa Boulevard that five people share, each with diverse interests. Junior’s room contains surround-sound speakers where<~~He listens to music in his speakers? he listens to music all the time; a book entitled Atheism: The Case Against God rests on his headboard. Hector’s room, the biggest of all, has huge Buddhist statues that are decorated with beads and flowers. In Jose and Carla’s room the king-sized bed takes up most of the space; a crucifix hangs on the wall next to a picture of the Virgin Mary.
    My room is neither the biggest nor the smallest; it’s perfect. It has decorated lavender drapes, old vintage records hung on the walls, and a King James Bible that I read daily can always be found near my bed. We all believe in something. Despite our different styles and religions, we are all a family who care for and love each other regardless of our religious beliefs.

    Check carefully ... I've made large and small changes.

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