english 114

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can anyone please help me? I am having to write an essay on Protecting Freedom of Expression by Derek Bok ,I have come up with a thesis but my teacher says no can some one help me with a arguemental thesis. new thesis how does this sound? Thesis: Using confederate flags and swastikas to protect the freedom of expression should no
be allowed because of the controversy that it causes among students on campus.

  • English 114 -

    Thesis: Using confederate flags and swastikas to protect the freedom of expression should not be allowed because of the controversy that it causes among students on campus.

    It's a thesis statement because your opinion is in there ("should not be allowed"), but it's not very strong. Take a good look at the 5th example here:
    http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/thesistatement.html

    How can you make your thesis stronger and more specific?

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