This is the exercise below i'm gonna write my answer: You need to write the Parks Board in your country a request for a refund. You held a family reunion at whitewater park on Saturday at the OAK pavilion which you had reserved for your group at a cost of $100. when the guests arrived, the picnic site was littered with trash. Your family had to spend the first half hour or so of their reunion cleaning up (and some of the trash wasn't that pleasant to handle). plus since some of the trash had been dragged across the picnic tables u had to wipe down them down with makeshift cleaning products before the guests could even sit down. These problems reflected poorly on u, the organizer and detracted from the guest's experience. U figure you deserve some money back (especially since some of ur city tax dollars were spent on maintenance of the parks). write the director, James Nagol, and tell him so.

Question

This is the exercise below i'm gonna write my answer: You need to write the Parks Board in your country a request for a refund. You held a family reunion at whitewater park on Saturday at the OAK pavilion which you had reserved for your group at a cost of $100. when the guests arrived, the picnic site was littered with trash. Your family had to spend the first half hour or so of their reunion cleaning up (and some of the trash wasn't that pleasant to handle). plus since some of the trash had been dragged across the picnic tables u had to wipe down them down with makeshift cleaning products before the guests could even sit down. These problems reflected poorly on u, the organizer and detracted from the guest's experience. U figure you deserve some money back (especially since some of ur city tax dollars were spent on maintenance of the parks). write the director, James Nagol, and tell him so.

MY ANSWER:
MY ADDRESS
pARK bOARD ADDRESS

Dear Mr J.. N...
i'm writing about the unacceptable service experienced by me my family and guests at whitewater park on saturday at the OAK pavilion which i paid for the reservation $100.

when my guests arrived the picnic site was littered with trash. my family had to spend the first half hour of their reunion. also the trash werre dragged across the picnic tables, you had cleaned them with makeshift cleaning product before the guest could sit down.

Due to this facts and because i am a citizen of this city i m aware that some tax dollars are spending on maintenance of the parks lead me to the decision of request for refunds.
Yours faithfully
L... D....

is it Formal?
is it right or need changes please can you state the changes i have to make??

Thank u

Answer 1

No one can take this letter seriously with your disregard for standard capitalization and punctuation.

We'll be glad to help you with this AFTER you correct it.

Answer 2

Dear Mr James Nagol

I held a family reunion at Whitewater Park on Saturday at the OAK Pavilion. I pay for reservation $100. i am sorry to say we did not have a good experience.

when my guests arrived the picnic site was littered with trash. My family had to spend the first half hour of their reunion to cleaned up. The trash were dragged across the picnic tables, you had to cleaned them with makeshift cleaning product before the guest could even sit down.

Because of this circumstances, i am requesting for refund $100. I believe this is a fair amount $60 due to the fact that my city tax dollars are spending on maintenance of the park.

Yours faithfully
Lisa jones

Answer 3

Much better.

I paid $100 for the reservation.

When my guests arrived, . . .

. . . to clean up.

. . . and we had to clean them with makeshift cleaning products before the guests . . .

Because of these circumstances, I am requesting a refund of $100.

I don't understand your last sentence.

Answer 4

the amount of $60 is my wrong.

Because of this circumstances, I am requesting a refund of $100. I believe this is a fair amount due to the fact that municipal tax dollars were spent on maintenance of the parks.

Answer 5

Excellent.

Answer 6

Your answer is mostly correct, but there are a few changes you can make to improve the formality and clarity of your letter. Here's an edited version of your letter:

[Your Name]
[Your Address]
[City, State, ZIP]

[Date]

James Nagol
Director, Parks Board
[Parks Board Address]
[City, State, ZIP]

Dear Mr. Nagol,

I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the service we experienced at Whitewater Park on Saturday, specifically at the OAK Pavilion which I had reserved for my family reunion at a cost of $100.

Upon the arrival of my guests, we were dismayed to find the picnic site littered with trash. As the organizer, my family and I had to spend the first half hour of the reunion cleaning up. Additionally, some of the trash had been dragged across the picnic tables, which required us to thoroughly wipe them down with makeshift cleaning products before our guests could even sit down. These issues not only reflected poorly on me as the organizer but also detracted from the overall experience for our guests.

Furthermore, as a citizen of this city, I am aware that some of my tax dollars go towards the maintenance of the parks. Considering the subpar conditions we encountered, I believe it is fair to request a refund for the inconvenience and additional efforts we had to endure.

I kindly request that you review our situation and take appropriate action to address our concerns. I would appreciate a prompt response regarding this matter.

Thank you for your attention to this issue.

Yours sincerely,

[Your Full Name]