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I have to write a triolet.Would you proof read this one for me?

Title: My Mother

My mother always wiped away all my tears
God must have sent this woman from above
When I cried she had a listening ear
She took away all my worries and fears
My mother always wiped away all my tears
There was no doubt of my mother’s love
My mother always wiped all my tears
God must have sent his woman from above

  • English -

    Line 7 needs to be identical to lines 1 and 4.

    http://www.baymoon.com/~ariadne/form/triolet.htm
    Scroll down to Form and make sure everything matches the directions. (For example, line 8 needs to exactly match line 2.)

  • English -

    Very close! Usually the first, fourth and seventh lines are identical. These are very close.

    Check the rhyme scheme: ABaAabAB

    Sra

  • English -

    Is this better. (Triolet)? Does it make sense?


    My Mother

    My mother always wiped away all my tears
    God must have sent this woman from above
    When I cried she had a listening ear
    My mother always wiped away all my tears
    She took away all my worries and fears
    There was no doubt of my mother’s love
    My mother always wiped away all my tears
    God must have sent his woman from above

  • English -

    A lot closer!

    Sra

  • English -

    What's that 5th word in the last line?

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