# English-Ms. Sue

posted by .

Ms. Sue the A-z story I did on the Ugly duckling was a rough draft. Now I have to polish it, and these are the postive and negative comments I received from some classmates.

Postive ones:
-Cute
-Descriptive
-Good ending
-Good grammar

Negative ones:
-No exciting point in story
-Don't understand semicolon in sentence N- doesn't work
-Improve sentence I
-J?- was confusing X?
-Heard before
-Sometimes too descriptive, & jumbled & squished together

I really want to make this story modern now. Have any suggestions for a good story line? Sad ones would be great, even a few comedy words would be fine. Thanks a lot for all your help:-)

• English-Ms. Sue -

To get an exciting part in the story -- you could elaborate on the episode when the duckling discovered that the grandma wanted to fatten him up to eat him for dinner.

Another version of this story could be about a homely and insecure child who grows up to be beautiful and confident.

• English-Ms. Sue -

Alright, I'll work on it and will hopefully be able to post it onto here tonight, thanks 4 ur help:-)

## Similar Questions

1. ### inequality

(x-4)/(2x+4) is greater than or equal to 1. How do i express solutions to inequalities in interval notation without using the calculator?
2. ### health

whata re some postive sterotypes for the older adults. I can think of many neg. ones but not many postive ones. all I really have is "your not getting older your getting better"
3. ### To Ms. Sue

Ms. Sue this is the A-Z story which I have been working on a few days ago. Finally it has been completed, and I would like you to edit it for me. I think that I have started it out well, but my ending bits are weird. I'll appreciate …
4. ### To Ms. Sue

Ms. Sue I have to create a plot for my A-Z story :The Ugly Duckling. Could you please check to see if I have gotten everthing under the right place. Thanks a lot 4 ur help:-) Plotline: Introduction: -A mother duck has given birth to …
5. ### To Ms. Sue

Ms. Sue do you think the title, "The Ugly Duckling suits the stoey I wrote about it, it doesn't quite seem to from my opinion.
6. ### riding

story the ugly duckling. what is the lesson in this story?
7. ### ms.sue 3 grade english

CAUSE AND EFFECT A CAUSE TELLS WHY SOMETHING HAPPENED. AN EFFECT IS WHAT HAPPENED. WORDS SUCH AS BECAUSE AND SO ARE CLUES THAT SHOW CAUSE-AND-EFFECT RELATIONSHIPS. SOMETIMES,HOWEVER,CLUE WORDS ARE NOT USED. DIRECTIONS-READ THE STORY.THEN …
8. ### to ms.sue

when i do this: Please select one of the two narrative prompts and write a rough draft. On the first day of school you will turn in the rough draft and any graphic organizers that you used to create your draft. The rough draft will …
9. ### English - ms. sue

thanks ms. sue for help with questions witht that story but i still need some help with few questions. it ask why the story be written in present tense?
10. ### English - ms. sue

ms. sue i also have to answer one question from story that be the story move from describing two similar friends to ones whose views become much different. it say what writer do to intensify contrast b/w the 2 to show that now each …

More Similar Questions