9th grade English

posted by .

This is the 2nd body paragraph for my Romeo and Juliet essay about fate. Can you please read over it and please give me your opinion and any advice on how to make it better.


Throughout the play, the characters have mentioned fate and fortune numerous times which exhibits their belief that predetermined events play throughout their lives. Near the beginning of the play, before Romeo goes to the Capulet's party, where he meets and falls in love with Juliet, he makes known that he has an unusual feeling and says, "Some consequence, yet hanging in ther stars/ Shall bitterly begin this fearful date..." (I.iv.107-108). He fears that Fate has something in stored for him, starting that night. His premonition fallows what the Chorus says in the Prolouge. Later in the play, Romeo chalenges Juliet's cousin, Tybalt, to a duel. Although Romeo emerges victorious, slaying Tybalt at the spot, Romeo immediately regrets his actions and exclaims, "O, I am fortune's fool!" (III.i.129). This suggests that Romeo believes that Fortune, not himself, was responsible for Tybalts death.

  • 9th grade English -

    "Throughout the play, the characters have mentioned fate and fortune numerous times which exhibits their belief that predetermined events play throughout their lives."

    Flows better as:
    "Throughout the play, the characters mention fate and fortune numerous times, exhibiting their belief that predetermined events play throughout their lives."


    Try to narrow down the summarizing of the story, you spend too much of the writing trying to tell the reader what happens in the story, and instead of having a literary response, it has become more of a summary.

    Allow me to grade it:
    (Out of 10)
    Flow: 7
    Ideas: 6 (Try for some more original concepts, think outside the box. It doesn't have to make sense, you just have to make it sound like it makes sense.)
    Vocabulary: 8 (Good usage of vocabulary, definetly sufficient)

    Hope this helps!

  • 9th grade English -

    you need an apostrophe on "Tybalts" in the last line.

    Nice job

  • 9th grade English -

    what is the poem a voice by pat mora about?

  • 9th grade English -

    you need an apostarophe at the end of the sentence in order to state that it is stateing something.

  • 9th grade English -

    Don't use run-on sentences!! which means if or when possible, start a new sentence.

Respond to this Question

First Name
School Subject
Your Answer

Similar Questions

  1. Romeo and Juliet (English Literature)

    1. To what heavenly body does Romeo compare Juliet?
  2. To: TP (Romeo and Juliet)

    I just saw your last post -- English - Connected Texts - TP, Saturday, April 12, 2008 at 4:17am Is Romeo and Juliet a book that has a lot of complex themes or messages?
  3. Literature

    State your opinion: Why do you think Romeo and Juliet remains so popular even to this day?
  4. english

    please help me with this. it's an essay question that i'm really stuck on based on romeo and juliet. please help!!! thanks what are some decisions Romeo had to make that could possibly decide his fate, and how are his decidion-making …
  5. english-PLEASE HELP

    i need help writing a thesis statement for an essay. the topic is this: use an example from romeo and juliet, write and essay analyzing Romeo's decision-making abilities at this point in the play. also, include a tough decision you …
  6. English Literature

    I have to do a literary essay on "Romeo and Juliet". My topic is, "Romeo's downfall was as a result of errors or mistakes he made in his judgement and the influence of fate.Discuss" Please could you help me get a few ideas/points?
  7. English

    Some readers argue that the adults in this play-- Friar Lawrence and Juliet's nurce--- do an incredibly BAD job of mentoring and providing guidance to romeo and juliet; in fact, some people believe that without these meddling adults, …
  8. English

    i have to write an essay based on Romeo and Juliet. The thesis is going to be based on Romeo's motive which is to marry Juliet. How can i start my introduction paragraph like the first few sentences before the thesis?
  9. Romeo and Juliet

    Read the following line from Romeo's monologue in Act II, Scene 2 of Romeo and Juliet: But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?
  10. english

    Can someone link me sites where they have information on the two below?

More Similar Questions