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Just in case you didn't see my correction to your earlier post, I am repeating it here.
Because the gender for "Mädchen" is neutral, you need to replace "sie" with "es" throughout your story.
"Es war einmal ein junges Mädchen. Es war sehr talentiert."
If you prefer, you could also replace "Mädchen" with "junge Frau", in which case "sie" would be correct.
"Es war einmal eine junge Frau. Sie war sehr talentiert."

Sorry I didn't catch that sooner.

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