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Does this sound argumentative enough and is worded correctly.

( I know that this isn't true but in my case for this paper this is what we have to do)

Fighting war for freedom is more efficient than having global peace and freedom.


fighting war for freedom is more effiecent than achieving global peace and freedom.

  • English -

    You need to get rid of the wording "global peace" -- it's a completely unrealistic idea. Just delete "global" and the rest will be OK.

    The second sentence is better -- without "global."

  • English -

    the problem is both statements here are the opposite of the truth.

    It is much more efficient to not crash a car than to crash it (go to war) and go through the time and expense of repairing it.

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