posted by Anonymous .
This is for my psychology class. We're doing an experiment/project thing. I decided to, like many others in the class, work on my personal life. What would you say are a guys intentions if you went to school with him from kindergarten to 8th grade and then go to separate high schools and only see eachother at Church. He asked you out a few times in grammar school, jokingly probably, but maybe not. Then say you see him at Church and he ignores you, but kind of appears shy. When you walk by he turns the other way or looks somewhere else-- anywhere but at you. when you first got to Church and first set eyes on him-- his eyes locked with yours for a few moments-- which seems like a long time( remember this is the first time you see him on this day at church ). He just kind of stared blankly, or in thought. I picked this situation to work on for my project. What do you think he's trying to put across to me? What do his actions convey?
Thanks so much for any and all help. I'm having trouble with this one...it's a challenging project for me
Send him a survey form. Ask him to answer. Tell him it is for class. Give him five dollars when it is completed, without lies.
Body signals vary amongst individuals. A lot of it depends on his background. Could it be that he thinks you will reject him? Send a cake or pie with the survey questions, as a peace offering.
Good luck. I frankly don't see much academic meat in this project, you would be better doing some behavioural modification.
In terms of a psychology class, you seem to be using a case study method.
However, one of the main rules of psychological research is not to deal with our own personal situations. Clinicians are not supposed to work with friends or relatives. You are more likely to be judgmental and respond emotionally with these people.
First, we will not be objective in interpreting data from friends or relatives. Second, even though it is unintentional, our behavior may influence our findings. For example, what was your response to his asking "you out"?
How will his response be influenced by what he thinks your future responses might be?
I would sugggest a project that has less emotional involvement.
You might try a survey on dating problems — how to ask someone out, what to do on a date, how to cope with a refusal, etceteras.
For example, take coping with a refusal. Do an open-ended pilot study about what a refusal means to the person refused and how it would effect future "asking others out." Once you get a frequency of various responses, you can use these to develop a multiple-choice questionnaire to be taken anonymously by peers. It helps to always include an "other" option to each question, which allows the respondent to write in a unique response.
You might also ask for other information to interpret your data like age, gender and previous dating experience.
Lastly, do not do this project on your own, but only start the project under the supervision of your teacher, who can help you to avoid potential problems.
I hope this helps a little more. Thanks for asking.