Here is the original paragraph and the second one is the corrected on:
I remember last year when was trying to choose the right school and worrying about it a lot. One day, a friend says that instead of talking about all the time I should visit a few places and see them. One afternoon, I decided to do just that I take the bus, and get off in the center of town, and from there walked to the campus. It’s immaculate, with no graffiti on any of the walls. Behind the visitor’s desk stood two students passing out brochures on programs and majors. The student union looks inviting, so I went in to get a can of soda and check it out. I sat down and started listening to the students at the other tables. I was curious to hear bits of their conservations. Students seemed to be treating each other with respect. I did not hear one sarcastic remark, and no one is rude to anyone else. I went to the library and had the same experience. Everyone seems so helpful and friendly. I knew this was the kind of atmosphere I would like. On my way out, I pick up an application from the visitor’s desk, both of the students behind the desk are smiling at me as I leave.
I remember last year when was trying to choose the right school and worrying about it a lot. One day, a friend says that instead of talking about all the time I should visit a few places and see them. One afternoon, I decided to do just that I took the bus, and got off in the center of town, and from there I walked to the campus. It was very clean, with no graffiti on any of the walls. Behind the visitor’s desk stood two students passing out brochures on programs and majors. The student union looks inviting, so I went in to get a can of soda and check it out. I sat down and started listening to the students at the other tables. I was curious to hear bits of their conservations. Students seemed to be treating each other with respect. I did not hear one sarcastic remark, and no one was rude to anyone else. I went to the library and had the same experience. Everyone seems so helpful and friendly. I knew this was the kind of atmosphere I would like. On my way out, I pick up an application from the visitor’s desk. Both of the students behind the desk are smiling at me as I leave.