can someone edit this
This racially perceptive scene clearly demonstrates how social separation due to racism will always end in bitterness. On the surface, Radio Raheem is merely speaking of how life is a consistent battle between good versus evil, love versus hate, and right versus wrong. As we probe deeper into his conversation with Mookie, we come to find out that he is, in all actuality, speaking of racism, as Mookie unexpectedly states, 'I love you black," thereby insinuating that the deeper idea of the scene is centered around ethnicity and skin color. In this way, it becomes reasonable to presume that Radio Raheem's love and hate sequence exemplifies how social separation due to racism will always end in bitterness through of story of Cain and Abel. He introduces the metaphorically rich tale by stating with his left knuckle, "Hate! It was with this hand that brother Cain iced his brother (Lee 1989)." This powerful statement refers to the Old Testament reading of the story of Cain, the first human born, and his brother Abel, the first human to die. Cain's immense hatred towards his fellow brother due to their differences led to his murdering of Abel, of which God greatly dissented. He mercilessly cursed Cain with the lumbering burdens of illness, isolation, and emotional bitterness for the remainder of hi natural being, as well as eventually ending the lives of the family line sprung from him, as to make up for Abel's potential family members. Consequently, Cain's hatred towards his brother ended in imminent bitterness for himself, as instead of being relieve following his brother's murder, he found himself carrying God's burden of sour agony. Furthermore, God felt bitter hatred towards Cain himself for his equally bitter deed, as well as his parents, Adam and Eve, who ceased to acknowledge him after the first homicide of humanity. In this way, Radio Raheem parallels Cain's hatred to racial hatred, and Abel's brotherly love to choosing not to act biased towards other races, thereby proving that separation due to racial hatred will end in imminent bitterness. Therefore, the love hate sequence portrayed by Radio Raheem proves how social preparation due to racism will always end in bitterness.
#1 -- Divide all this into appropriate paragraphs! Just looking at all this in one huge paragraph, I'd give it a D at most.
Then ...
Go over your paper with the following in mind. Thanks to PsyDAG for the following:
In the future, if nobody is available to proofread your work, you can do this yourself. After writing your material, put it aside for a day — at least several hours. (This breaks mental sets you might have that keep you from noticing problems.) Then read it aloud as if you were reading someone else's work. (Reading aloud slows down your reading, so you are less likely to skip over problems.)
(You can also either read it aloud to someone else or have someone else read it aloud to you! The latter works really well!)
If your reading goes smoothly, that is fine. However, wherever you "stumble" in your reading, other people are likely to have a problem in reading your material. Those "stumbles" indicate areas that need revising.
Once you have made your revisions, repeat the process above. Good papers often require many drafts.
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And here are some really good websites that will help, too:
http://teachro.publiccomputingservices.org/writing/proofreading.htm
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/proofing.htm
The following is a revised version of the text:
This scene portrays the negative consequences of social separation caused by racism, resulting in bitterness. Initially, Radio Raheem discusses the ongoing battle between good and evil, love and hate, and right and wrong. However, as the conversation progresses with Mookie, it becomes evident that Raheem is addressing racism when Mookie unexpectedly says, "I love you black." This implies that the deeper meaning of the scene revolves around ethnicity and skin color.
One can interpret Raheem's love and hate sequence as a representation of how social separation due to racism always leads to bitterness, drawing parallels to the biblical story of Cain and Abel. Raheem introduces this metaphorical tale by saying, "Hate! It was with this hand that brother Cain iced his brother (Lee 1989)." This statement references the Old Testament account of Cain, the first human born, who harbored immense hatred towards his brother Abel, leading to Abel's murder. God strongly disapproved of this act.
God cursed Cain with illness, isolation, and emotional bitterness throughout his life, and later extinguished the family line descended from him to compensate for the loss of potential descendants from Abel. Consequently, Cain experienced the bitterness resulting from his hatred towards his brother, burdened by the agony imposed by God. Furthermore, God held bitter feelings towards Cain himself for his heinous deed, as well as towards Cain's parents, Adam and Eve, who failed to acknowledge their responsibility after this initial act of violence among humans.
In drawing parallels to Cain's hatred, Radio Raheem connects it to racial hatred, while presenting Abel's brotherly love as the choice to refrain from biased behavior towards other races. This implies that separation due to racial hatred will ultimately lead to bitterness. Therefore, Radio Raheem's depiction of the love-hate sequence highlights how social division caused by racism inevitably results in bitterness.